West of Mars

Originally, Trevor’s Song was supposed to be the follow-up book to the story of Mitchell, Kerri, and Kerri’s mother. It was supposed to tell the story of ShapeShifter’s dead bass player. The hows, the whys … all that fun stuff.

But then I woke up one day and realized that Trevor’s Song is really the better story. That I’m still floundering with the story of Kerri’s mother; it’s not right. Yet. So shopping commenced and by last May — yeah, a few short months ago — I realized that the problem I’m having with selling Trevor’s Song isn’t the writing or the story or anything of the sort. It’s that it’s hard to sell a book about a rock star. It’s hard to sell a book about a dude with cancer.

Put them together and it ain’t like what you get when chocolate and peanut butter taste great together.

At about this time, some of you devoted groupies started to really fall hard for Trevor Wolff. You guys love the man.

And I began to feel guilty. Because, after all, I know how the book ends. It ain’t pretty. And you guys won’t like it. The more Rhian fights the whole world for her shot at Trevor, the worse I’ve been feeling.

Thunder and lightning have been themes for me this summer, and today, lightning struck in the form of Lisa Andel, who is probably floored by the ease with which I took what was a very bold, critical statement and found paydirt. All those years of writers’ workshops in undergrad and MFA programs do pay off in the long run, boys and girls. They teach you how to stare down an ugly truth and turn it into something beautiful.

So… the post I had edited for later today will have to wait a few while you digest this news and try to figure out what I’m up to. Booking Through Thursday, which I was going to have a lot of fun with this week, will have to wait for another day and another topic.

Right now, I’ve got a book to revise. And an ending that’ll make Rhian just that much happier.

Maybe.

I mean, there’s still this girl named Heather for her to consider…

Over the past few weeks, we’ve talked quite a bit about groupies. We started with stereotypes, moved on to the truth, and then spent last week celebrating ShapeShifter and you guys who’ve become my groupies (or are about to).

This week, to end the unit of study, I thought I’d bring you the notes of famed journalist Kermit Ladd, who continues to try to sit down and control an interview with the members of ShapeShifter. Being a smart sort, Kermit sat down with frontman/rhythm guitarist Mitchell Voss, but before long, the party was crashed, and this is what ensued:

Thirteen Things about Groupies Thirteen things about Groupies 1. Mitchell: The thing about groupies, what makes them so good, is that they love us. Trevor: It’s all about the love. Mitchell: No, no. Really. These women love us. To the point that they’d marry us if they could. Trevor (sniffs): Like I’m getting married? Ever? 2. Mitchell: Hold on a second. You see, when someone loves you, all they want to do is please you. Trevor: And please us they do. (He folds his arms over his chest and nods once. Firmly.) 3. Mitchell: For them, it’s all about giving pleasure. All we need to do is sit back and take it. 4. Trevor: You greedy, lying bastard. You get off on showering these girls with attention just as much as I do. Watching them start to drool ’cause you’re looking at them and then they hold their breaths, hoping you’re about to give ‘em that invite they want so bad… (He takes a deep breath through his nose, his eyes closed in satisfaction.) Yeah, that’s the best. 5. Mitchell: Here’s the thing with groupies. We do make fun of them when they can’t hear, but you’re not a real band until you’ve got ‘em. We know that. We love them for it. Trevor: We make fun of them when they’re not around? (Mitchell cuffs the back of Trevor’s head.) 6. Mitchell: They’re important people in the world of a band. The smart (he gives Trevor a sidelong glance) guys know this. The groupies who are cool or extra-special, if you know what I mean, those are the girls we’ll tell the crew to keep an eye out for. Trevor: Sort of like that Lana chick. The whole crew knows Lana. They watch out for her. Help her past venue security, give her passes without the usual payment, make sure she gets fed. Mitchell: I heard Cookie once slipped food out of the crew’s catering for her. Trevor: Wouldn’t surprise me. Cookie knows who he works for. Mitchell: The band? Trevor: Me, you dumbfuck. 7. Mitchell: These groupies, the devoted ones, they’ll say they work for us. That they’re as essential to us as people like Cookie are. Trevor: They’re wrong. They’re in it for themselves. To get close to us. Cookie’s around to be my bass tech. Mitchell: Might want to tell him that. I know he likes your rejects. 8. Trevor: How’d we get on to this? We started off saying that these girls are all about pleasing us. Mitchell: They are. Trevor: But now you’re saying they’re all about getting close to us. Mitchell: Nope. You said that. Not me. Trevor: Same fucking thing. (Mitchell gives him a confused look) 9. Trevor: Are we done with the groupies yet? I’m bored. Mitchell: Nope. We have four more points to make. Trevor: Why not get Adam and his camera in here and let him do a picture thing? Mitchell: Because this guy’s here to talk to us. Talk, Trev. Not look at pictures. Trevor: Pictures are more interesting. I’m done talking. (Trevor wanders off) 10. Mitchell: So I guess we’re back to just me, huh? Shit. Maybe Trevor’s right and we have said it all. 11. Mitchell: Nope, never taken pictures of the girls I’ve been with just so I can remember them later. That’s probably a good thing. Now that I’m married, I’d have to burn them all. 12. Mitchell: Nope, not going to write some tell-all book and spill it all. What happened back in my single days needs to stay there, and not just because Kerri doesn’t want to hear it. 13. Mitchell: Yes, girls do still grab my dick and slip me some tongue and do everything else they can think of to get me to take them over my wife. Not a single one of them’s gotten anything but an escort out of the room, though. I don’t care how great they are, Kerri’s better. I guess that means my groupie days are done.

I’ve decided to do a Web Wanderer type of thing and highlight some of the books that I come across through my own wanderings. Check ‘em out; there are debuts in here that you can put aside for this winter’s Debut a Debut, and there are hidden treasures in here that you may want to fill up the time between now and Debut a Debut with.

The Department of Lost and Found

Bookgasm looks at Dark Gold, now out in paperback — and includes a hot excerpt…

Critical Mass leans a bit more literary than my tastes do, but these might be good.

Ace and Hoser are at it again, with A Gathering Light.

Another one from Critical Mass, looking at stealth best-sellers. How many of us authors dream of having this happen to us? Not only would I love to see it happen to me and Trevor’s Song, I’d love to help you guys make it happen, too.

A non-book note. Yesterday was #1’s first day of second grade. It was the last day in which he’d be six (yes, today’s his birthday), and it was also the day in which he lost his first tooth. Talk about a day of firsts and lasts!!

Now, you all know that it’s part of Chelle LaFleur’s job to be a busy girl. Bands come to town, Chelle’s there in the audience, reviewing the show for this here Trumpet newspaper. Bands get ready to come to town, Chelle’s on the phone with them, getting interviews so her precious readers have a clue or two about the bands playing our lovely city and might actually turn out to check out something new.

Anyone who’s been reading this here space for awhile knows how many different bands Chelle sees. And that being the music critic means that Chelle sometimes has to go hear bands who she wouldn’t download if you paid her to. Not that they’re not good. They’re just not her style.

That’s the case with a band just breaking into the national music scene. You say you love music? Then go check them out, but don’t be expecting to run into Chelle LaFleur out and about the town inside of one of their shirts. Actually, they have a pretty good name: Nerdvana. Maybe if they want to win this city over, they can comp me the 4XL ol’ Chelle needs and she’ll even wear it to a ShapeShifter show. Chelle’s used to sticking out in those metal crowds.

She stood out in the Nerdvana crowd, too. Turns out saying Nerdvana’s the polar different from ShapeShifter’s being gentle with you good readers.

They’re from Baton Rouge, of all places, so you’d think they’d rock. Their name Nerdvana screams of the irony and alternative rock you Tulane types dig so much. We’ll save the irony and alternative rock for another time ’cause there’s nothing ironic about Nerdvana. Alternative… yeah, they’re an alternative to most of what’s out there, but alt radio ain’t gonna be hugging these guys and making nice on them so fast.

Good thing I’m not Nerdvana’s manager ’cause for the life of me, Chelle can’t figure out which radio station to stick ‘em on. They belong with the Golden Oldies and poodle skirts and sock hops. They got that harmonizing thing going, they’re four boys with crew cuts and ears that stick out and square glasses and probably pocket protectors, too. Their guitar player holds his axe so high that Mitchell Voss gets arm cramps just looking at them, but then again, if anyone wears their guitar lower than Mitchell Voss, I’d like to meet him. Or her.

The best way Chelle can put it is that these boys croon. The old men who sang the standards before they were standard? They’re up there in heaven, where all good crooners go, cheering these boys on. Seriously. You could play Nerdvana in the middle of any of those oldies and unless you listened to the words, you’d think their songs were as old as the others.

Maybe they’ll turn out to be nothing more than a novelty, which is fine with Chelle LaFleur, who refuses to put on a poodle skirt ’cause that’s just disrespectful to poodles everywhere. But you heard it first and you heard it here: Nerdvana’s doing something different. If you can take their kind of music, make sure you look into ‘em.

Only one thing left to do for the Summer’s Hidden Treasures contest I was running — mail out the books that you guys won. Either Karen or I have contacted all of the winners; check here for the prize list, in case you think you missed a message from one of us. For the record, we had more entrants than prizes, so not all of you won. I’m sorry about that. For Debut a Debut coming up, we’ll try for even more prizes.

Speaking of Debut a Debut, yes, we’ll be back with that in the winter. I’m working on making some changes, spreading it out over a number of blogs instead of having everything here. If you’d like to be part, drop me a line. Yes, you can feature a book or do an author interview (even if you interview yourself) and still be eligible for prizes.

I need to publicly thank Robin for coming up with the idea for this past Thursday’s Concept Thirteen. If you missed it, a bunch of Thirteeners posted about me and ShapeShifter, my fictional band. Why? Because we could.

So I’d like to point out the posts by Thomma Lyn, L^2, Nancy, Jill, and Camille — and who am I forgetting? Please remind me (I’ve had a migraine since Wednesday and today is Saturday, so you know how impaired my thought process is by this point)! As the headache fades, the boy’s birthday is celebrated, school begun, and fallout from this week’s stress is all dealt with, I’ll have the Tour Manager put up a new page at my main site. Yup, it’ll be devoted to you crazy groupies and all these great posts.

I love it. We’re starting to create fan fiction for a book that’s not published.

YET.

We so rock.

Over the last two weeks, I’ve been talking about ShapeShifter groupies. I’ve forgotten one of the most important varieties of groupies, however.

MINE.

The time seems right to proudly unveil my new graphic for you. If you’d like to display it on your own blog or website, I’d be honored. (just … please don’t hotlink!) And yes, at some unidentified point in the future, look for me to start giving away prizes to anyone with the graphic on their blog.

[ The graphic is available in both JPG and GIF formats, with either white or orange text - The Tour Manager ]

And now, on to business:

Thirteen ways to tell you’re a true West of Mars Groupie 1. You check the blog repeatedly throughout the day for updates, even though you get the feed. 2. You call radio stations and ask them to play ShapeShifter’s Still Life or Behold Me. 3. You try to book your vacation to Riverview, USA. 4. You bug Susan for West of Mars and ShapeShifter merchandise, and then you buy lots of it once she coughs it up. 5. You have dreams in which you get to meet Mitchell Voss or Trevor Wolff. 6. You want to go to Riverview Art Academy, like Kerri did. 7. To prove you’re worthy of Riverview Art Academy, you submit art to Susan (who will post any fan art on her website and talk to you about using some for t-shirts if she likes your stuff!) 8. You ask your local guitar shop to outfit you with the same gear that ShapeShifter uses. 9. You spend hours Googling in search of ShapeShifter tabs. 10. You write fan fiction, which Susan gladly posts on her website. 11. You make all your friends stop by ’cause this is something they just can’t miss out on. 12. You e-mail Susan and offer suggestions for outtakes. 13. You e-mail Susan and suggest real things that she ought to check out and incorporate into the fictional world of Riverview USA.

There you go! Do you resemble any of these? I suspect a few (or more) of you do… Your devotion to Trevor and company, along with your unflagging support have been a source of determination and strength whenever I get down about not having a book to give you yet. Keep on making this noise and I’ll either give in and self-publish or we’ll find a brave agent and publisher yet. Either way, it’ll get a book in your hands, and that’s what our ultimate goal is.

Once again, thanks to all you groupies. You guys rock.

I might be getting immune to these honors, guys!

Jenny McB, who is fast becoming one of my most recent groupies, has awarded me with the Nice Matters Award. She said she gave it to me because of my positive comments here and at other blogs. I do try my best to always be positive and upbeat. Misery may love company but smiles make everyone feel good.

Here’s the details about this one:
This award is for those bloggers who are nice people; good blog friends and those who inspire good feelings and inspiration. Also for those who are a positive influence on our blogging world. Once you’ve been awarded please pass it on to 7 others who you feel are deserving of this award.

The next one is the Thoughtful Blogger Award, given to me by one of my groupies and buds, Amy Ruttan. Amy’s one of my favorite blog reads; one of those people I always turn to first when I see her listed in my reader. If you don’t read Amy’s blog, why not???

Now, another Meme, but this one’s cool ’cause some of you have no clue what’s hiding in my archives. I’m aiming to fix that rather permanently, but not just yet. I’ve got some other small details to take care of, first.

Marcia, at MeeAugraphie and Tumbled Words (and whose RSS feed I miss dearly), tagged me with this one.

Here we go…
Link 1 must be about family: One of my all-time favorites. This scene actually existed before the blog. Although I like this one a lot, too. Or… Or…

Link 2 must be about friends: This was a hard one to pick. Friends are important in my fictional world. Friends take the place of family, and family takes the place of friends.

Anyone think I’m trying to make a statement?

Link 3 must be about yourself, who you are, what you’re all about: Umm… Help! This blog isn’t about me! It’s about my fiction!

Link 4 must be about something you love: I’ll explain more later about why this is such an important thing.

Oh, hell, I’ll do it here: people are trying to ban this book because of its liberal use of the F-word (I did it delicately for you, Marcia!). But really. If you’re going to set a book in the world of punk rock, you may as well do it authentically. And KL Going has done just that. Trust me. I used to live in places like she creates. Or so it felt at the time.

Furthermore, does anyone REALLY believe that by the time our kids are old enough to form bands and hang out in clubs, they haven’t heard words like fuck?

Fat Kid Rules the World. Buy it. (it is still in print, if you’d like a new copy) Let’s turn the negative publicity into huge sales.

I just might have to help author KL Going take on the idiot wanna-be book banners… That’s really got my dander up.

Now, back to the Meme. Really, it’s more fun to talk about Fat Kid. Helloooo? I’m boring, remember?

Link 5 can be anything you choose: Oh, really. Just go play in the archives. But here’s one I particularly like. Then again, I particularly like them all. The ones I don’t like are waiting to be revised into that state of being particularly liked.

Go find some you like. Report back to me; it’ll help me know what to feed you guys next.

Oh, and rather than pass this one, really. Just go buy Fat Kid. It’s about book banning, people. I mean, other than the sales the publicity will generate, do you want your book to be banned? And if it is, who’ll fight for it — and you???

Well, other than me. *wink*

I’ve got all the prizes for the Summer’s Hidden Treasures contest sorted out now, thanks to my Opening Act. If you entered the contest, look for a message from me starting tonight!

I’m taking a break from drawing names and matching them up with prizes from the Summer’s Hidden Treasures contest. A bit too much weekend put me a bit behind schedule, so stay tuned for news of the winners. In the meantime, here’s a visit with our Roadie Poet.

Wearing Pink

New girl at the sound board.
She’s in pink.
Pink.

Hambone says she’s new.
I say she’s someone’s girl.
’cause crew,
We know
you don’t wear pink.

Black’s the roadie’s color
Maybe white,
If it’s a shirt for the local crew
Who’ll be invisible by showtime.
Maybe white.
Maybe.

Near showtime,
Hambone chases me down.
I’m gaffing the last of the stage.
Shoulda been done hours ago.
Fucking local crew.

Hambone points her out.
Not in pink no more.
Wearing black.
Sitting at the sound board.

She bounces,
All excited like,
And Hambone hands me twenty.

Sure enough,
Come morning,
Another girl’s in her spot.
This one’s
Wearing pink, too.

*sigh*

This is the sign of burnout. Right here, folks.

I owe two more Blogging Tips Memes, but to be honest with you, I lost heart. I had the drafts saved; all I needed to do was post them.

But then I was blog surfing and came onto some strangers’ blogs and what did I see? Memes. And not the fun kind, like the Schmoozing award (we’ll get to that one in a second). The kind that didn’t give me ANY inkling into what the blog was about. And I thought, I don’t want this to be what people see when they visit me.

Thus, I nuked the drafts of Blogging Tips #3 and 4. Really, I have no words of wisdom other than to say have fun with what you do. And if you can’t glean that from my posts or from the fun comment trails, nothing I can spell out will help.

Thus, on to the FUN.

Both PJ at the Urban Recluse and Thomma Lyn have graced me with The Power of Schmooze Award.

This one means as much as the Rockin’ Wench Awards you guys handed me. I’m gonna get all sappy here and make poor Trevor throw up in his motorcycle boots, but so be it. I’m pleased you guys have let me be part of your lives, and I’m even more pleased when you demand I step in front of my fictional characters and speak to you as myself. Most of all, it gives me hope that when Trevor’s Song finally hits the shelves, you’ll all buy multiple copies. Yes, I promise now to make it VERY easy for you to get autographed copies, all the while helping out some local-to-me independent bookstores.

…and in the week since I wrote this post, more awards have come my way. I’ll get to those later in the week or next week. Stay tuned. By all means, keep the honors coming! It’s not just good for my ego in the face of rejection letters for a hard-to-place debut novel. It makes Trevor and the rest of the band happy.

Now, onward. There’s more fictional fun ahead for you; my blog queue is stuffed to overflowing. There are more changes afoot… keep your eyeballs peeled.

And in the meantime, my friends, rock on.

First off, entries for the Summer’s Hidden Treasures contest are now closed! Thanks to everyone who read a hidden treasure; sounds like you guys found good stuff out there.

Secondly, this week’s Booking Through Thursday asks us about monogamy. You regulars around here should know how vehemently Trevor hates monogamy, and that should be the end of it, since Trevor is a creature of my own construct.

However, the nice thing about fiction is that you get to create characters who are different from yourself. Thus, I’m all about monogamy … where the Tour Manager’s concerned. (Once you meet him, you’ll agree. And envy me. He’s the best.)

That’s a marriage, though. The until-death-do-us-part type.

Reading a book is a marriage of a different sort. It’s the sort that lets you enter and exit the book’s world at a second’s notice, yet at the same time, the best ones suck you in and demand full attention.

However, that doesn’t mean you should be devoted exclusively to one world at a time. I usually have at least two books going: one upstairs by my bed and one downstairs, in the family room. I’m never searching for my book, only to realize it’s midnight, I’m in pajamas that are a bit too revealing for the glass front entry I’ll have to pass through, and I’m too tired to drag myself up and down the steps again today. And yes, I’ve been there. And yes, I’ve strolled through the front entry in my jammies and given thanks for living on a quiet street with early birds.

Back soon with a final update on the Summer’s Hidden Treasures contest. If you can’t wait, visit it at my website.