Trevor’s Word of the Moment: Nincompoop

Nincompoop

It’s too easy to say that Mitchell’s a nincompoop and that’s all there is to it. Trevor Wolff does not take the easy way out. Ever. So that means I gotta say more about nincompoops.

We meet fans who are nincompoops all the fucking time, youknowwhatI’msayinghere? Fans who gotta brag to us about how great they are. Fans who tell us we suck or other stupid shit like that. If you think we suck, why the fuck are you listening to us? Why the fuck did you buy a ticket and a t-shirt and the CD and probably the official ShapeShifter stuffed dragon? You do know, asshole, that we made those dragons for the girls who dream of fucking Mitchell, right? Put a dragon in your bed and it’s the next best thing. It’ll let you spend the night, too, which Mitchell never would, even in the days before Rusty.

And then there’s the people we meet on the road. The fucking nincompoops who gotta make a big deal of our hair. Yeah, so it’s long. That doesn’t mean we want to be girls, you loser jackass. It means the girls dig our hair. They dig running their hands through it. They get off when we let the ends of it tickle their bare bellies.

Assholes like that are probably too stuck on themselves to know what it means to give a girl some pleasure. Real pleasure. Not the kind those losers see in porn flicks and think happens in real life.

Real life is way better, losers.

Look, the world is packed chock full of nincompoops. Surviving this shit we call life turns into Nincompoop Avoidance. And if that doesn’t work, go for Nincompoop Humiliation.

Just so long as Trevor comes out on top, it’s all good.