January 31, 2008
This week’s question, What are some of the more outrageous characters you’ve read, and how do you feel about them? resulted in my blog being hijacked. Again.
Hey. Trevor Wolff here. You know: bass player of ShapeShifter, star of Trevor’s Song, and all-around bad ass.
I should be at the top of every single one of your lists this week. But here’s the problem: I’m to be too fucking quirky for most of those egghead publishers. Susan gets these letters that she asked a literary agent about and the answer’s what she thought it was: no editor at a publishing house is brave enough to take me on. Seems books about rock stars like me don’t sell.
Now, here’s the deal. I guarantee you that if you read my book and get to know me, I’ll head up your list. You’ll buy Susan’s book about me for your friends. Shit, you’ll give it to your worst enemy just because you gotta share me with someone and you just ran out of friends but that’s not gonna stop your cute ass.
Yeah, yeah, publishing’s a business and all that. Who do you think created this fucking band? You think it was that blondie all the girls drool over? No. It was me. Trevor Fucking Wolff.
Trevor knows business.
And I fucking hate people who talk about themselves without using the word I. I’s a great word. Know why? ’cause it’s all about me.
Want to see me in print? Get your asses back here. Lots. Spread the word about this ugly bass player who makes up for it in every single way. Let’s prove to those scaredy-asses that yeah, people want Trevor, and for the length of an entire novel.
Rock stars do sell. We don’t sell out, but we do sell.
I got the Platinum Records on my wall to prove it.
bunnygirl
January 31, 2008 5:37 pm
That goes without saying, Trevor. I told Susan to print up a book of outtakes or short stories about you so we could all buy it and prove that stories about you sell. BR/BR/She was advised not to.BR/BR/I don’t know what else to say, except that we love you!
Karen
January 31, 2008 5:41 pm
Yeah, Trev!
Jinger
January 31, 2008 6:01 pm
Keep kicking ass! I think you guys are the shit and I can’t wait until some publisher sits up and says YEAH, we WANT you!BR/BR/I have to get back to a couple of demons.BR/BR/JJ
Donica Covey
January 31, 2008 6:05 pm
Yeah! You let ’em have it Trevor! It’s time the publishers sit up and see that you DO sell. BR/BR/Susan–Email me. I’m curious to know who you’ve tried and who is still out there. I’ve got a short list of some pretty flexible places. BR/BR/Donica
Thomma Lyn
January 31, 2008 7:04 pm
Trev, you IROCK!/I And we love you!
Trevor
January 31, 2008 7:06 pm
I’d like to love you right back, Thomma Lyn, but Mitchell’s tired of getting into fights with husbands.BR/BR/Think yours would loan you out? You won’t want him back when I’m done with you, but so what? Like he doesn’t leave his dirty underwear on the floor?
Breeni Books
January 31, 2008 9:19 pm
I love you, Trevor!
Trevor
January 31, 2008 9:20 pm
Yeah? Prove it.
Omykiss
January 31, 2008 10:07 pm
hello susan … i’m here from michele’s …. trevor seems like an alright guy …. rock stars are a bit like aliens. i like aliens.
pussreboots
January 31, 2008 10:19 pm
But I’ve run into lots of Trevor types in books I’ve read. Keep trying. Someone will have read the same books I have.BR/BR/#2 on my list of favorite quirky characters was played by a quirky guitar player. But that’s a different story.BR/BR/Happy BTT.
Thomma Lyn
February 1, 2008 2:58 am
Trevor, before we go any further, I must know: BR/Is it my long, pianist’s fingers that entrance you so? ;)BR/BR/(ACK — a rhyming couplet!!!!!)
Darla
February 1, 2008 6:49 am
Seriously, I’ve read characters who were more out-there than you, Trevor. BR/BR/As I’ve been telling another friend who’s in the same position–great stories, hasn’t found a publisher yet: you’re weeding out all the editors who aren’t right for you. BR/BR/***smooches*** Trevor, and hang in there. I really, really, want to read your whole book. 🙂
gautami tripathy
February 1, 2008 7:26 am
Trevor, you sure are weird. I would love to read books featuring you..:D
Amy Ruttan
February 1, 2008 11:22 am
We all love you Trevor!!
FRIGGA
February 1, 2008 12:16 pm
Haha, Trevor cracks me up!BR/BR/I(pssst! hint hint rockinwithfrigga!!!)/IBR/BR/Huh, what was that? Nope, I didn’t hear anything! 🙂
Rhonda Leigh
February 1, 2008 12:46 pm
Rock stars don’t sell?? I can’t tell you how many agents have told me vampires don’t sell either. I happen to like quirky. In fact, if it isn’t quirky, chances are, I won’t like it. BR/BR/And…my vamps are musicians. They certainly behave like rock stars. ;)BR/BR/Maybe one of these days I’ll be able to convince my violinist to post at my blog. He used to get out and about quite a bit, but a guy like him inevitably runs into trouble at some point. 😉
Trevor
February 1, 2008 1:02 pm
You girls who say it’s not size that matters but how you use it have it right. C’mon over and I’ll show you what I mean.
Susan Helene Gottfried
February 1, 2008 1:08 pm
Darla and Gautami, I think you took some of the wind out of Trevor’s sails. Not that this is a bad thing at the moment; I was ready to tie myself to my desk chair, it’s blowing so hard in here.BR/BR/Which of course, like Amy’s comment, has Trevor cackling with glee and forming comebacks.BR/BR/I swear, it’s like living with Beavis.
Maddy
February 1, 2008 1:57 pm
My baby bruvver skipped the agents and went straight to the publishing houses. I don’t know how he did it, I don’t know how anyone really does it, but I do know that there are so many books on the shelves that I wouldn’t use for toilet paper! How can so much crap be published and yet books that would want to read can’t make it? There again, I also know that some writers wrote for a decade or more before their books were ever published e.g. PD James and JK Rowling to name just two.BR/Keep going dearie
Robin
February 1, 2008 2:03 pm
You rock Trevor! Now go kick some literary ass!
Wylie Kinson
February 1, 2008 5:06 pm
Yeah Trevor – You tell those mofo’s that your public is waiting!!
Marcia (MeeAugraphie)
February 3, 2008 11:16 pm
Forget the publishers. Trevor, remind Susan she’s talked about just doing it herself. Should be right up your alley,… Show those publishers a thing or two about what they could have had but were too freakin timid to go for it.BR/BR/There is a virtual army of bloggers out there that will buy/read all those things Susan has been keeping secret about you. Then they’ll type away in the wee hours of the night to post honest reviews on Amazon and all those other places groupies might search you out… myspace, underground mags, trash cans. I’m too old to stay up that late, but do it in the shadows of daylight.
Susan Helene Gottfried
February 4, 2008 8:49 am
Sheesh, Marcia. I hope you are right; we may be finding out!
Alice Audrey
August 18, 2008 11:21 am
I’m glad I get to read it here.