Tag Archives: mooching

Dear Employees…

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A copy of the letter I intend to write one day when I have employees to torture.

Dear Employees.

I know Thursday is a holiday. Friday’s still a work day, and as you know, I do not tolerate slacking. Therefore, I insist that you spend your day after the holiday engaged in the following projects
1. Sleep late.
2. Spend time with your spouse/partner/kids. Make memories.
3. Tidy up the yard if you’ve got one.
4. Bake cookies.
5. Send a sample to your boss.
6. Pet the cat. Walk the dog. Feed the fish. Change the paper in the guinea pig or gerbil’s cage.
7. Take a nap.

Once you’re done with all that, sit back down to whatever you’re working in refreshed and glad to be employed be someone as utterly cool as me.

What do you think? Want to come work for West of Mars?

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