ShapeShifter Fiction: Beached Whales (post Trevor’s Song Era)


Kerri set down the dishtowel she was using to dry Val’s good china with, handed the last plate over, and walked into the family room. Daniel and Mitchell were being awfully quiet for two men who’d been all hyped about the big game.

She walked down the two steps into the sunken room and took in the scene.

The boys lay head-to-head on the L-shaped sectional. Mitchell had one leg thrown over the back of the couch; Daniel had one foot on the floor. Both men had extended their other leg, Daniel’s foot dangling off the edge of the beige leather couch.

Kerri chuckled as she noticed that they both hadn’t just unbuttoned their pants after that feast; they’d undone their flies, too.

“Hey, Val?” she drawled.

Mitchell’s head shot up and he slitted his eyes as if shooting poison at her. She smiled; he knew her tone of voice all too well.

“Yeah?” Val asked, wiping her hands on her hot pink dishtowel and crossing the kitchen to join Kerri. She stopped on the stair behind Kerri, one knee bent, the same hip jutted out in a classic model’s pose.

“Where’d you find the beached whales?”

“Wholesale district. Imported from Japan; they were cheap.”

Daniel burped. Mitchell smirked and put his head back down.

Kerri shook her head. “Waste of good veal, if you ask me. Whale stuffing ought to be cheap.”

“Actually, I think it’s the highest praise a chef can get,” Val said, tossing the dishtowel over her shoulder and pulling her hip back in line with the other. “When you can turn two grown men into beached whales, you know your cooking’s good.”

“Or that food on the road is that bad,” Daniel said. “Really, Val, come out and be our caterer.”

She winked at Kerri. As if there was any way to pry Val out of her house. “If I do,” she said, “will you change the name of the band to Beached Whales?”

“We may have to,” Mitchell said and, at last, burped.

The curtains fluttered, and Val and Kerri exchanged amused smiles as they went back to putting the plates away.

Want more? Click on the cast of character tab above. And don’t forget to take a ride on Rhian’s Poetry Train!



  1. Robin

    November 25, 2007 3:39 pm

    Great stuff Susan, or should that be great stuffing LOL?BR/BR/Over here, it wasn’t just the men that ended up feeling that way…

  2. spyscribbler

    November 25, 2007 3:42 pm

    Funny, love it! Very vivid.BR/BR/I’m kinda glad I didn’t get stuffed this year; I hate that beached whale feeling!

  3. Angie

    November 25, 2007 4:50 pm

    Ha ha..very cute and very apt. BR/BR/Hello from Michele’s place. 🙂

  4. OldOldLady Of The Hills

    November 25, 2007 4:53 pm

    Well, this is itriguiging….These two ment with their pants and fly’s undone/open? Hmmmmmm. Why did my mind go to something quite intimate than haqving eaten too much food….? LOL!BR/BR/I will have to read more and get back to you….Michele says “HI”, dear Susan!

  5. rashbre

    November 25, 2007 5:13 pm

    An amusing snippet, with some good metaphors! And very apt for the Thanksgiving weekend.BR/BR/Here today via Michele’s! Hiya!BR/BR/A HREF=”” REL=”nofollow”rashbre/A

  6. Oracle

    November 25, 2007 5:36 pm

    Im from the wrong side of the pond but it painted all the right colours for me ;)BR/BR/Thank you

  7. Omykiss

    November 25, 2007 5:44 pm

    hello, michele sent me … I love the beached whale image … perfect!

  8. Rhian

    November 25, 2007 7:55 pm

    Something everyone can truly relate to after the T-day indulgence.

  9. bunnygirl

    November 25, 2007 8:05 pm

    I feel that way every Saturday after Indian buffet. I never met a daal I didn’t like.

  10. Amy Ruttan

    November 25, 2007 8:42 pm

    I hope you had a good thanksgiving. That whale feeling applied to me in October. Thankfully not this week.BR/BR/I did an excerpt to, and NO it’s not Christmas related. I’m bowing to Sparky Ducks wishes. LOL!

  11. Ann

    November 25, 2007 9:00 pm

    Yup, great stuff. No beached whales here this year either.BR/And you’re page loaded no problem. Yay! Good night, Susan.

  12. Jill

    November 25, 2007 10:29 pm

    It is very ungracious of the guys!! But then so much funny!! Told them they can do the same thing as Joey in Friend next time!!

  13. julia

    November 26, 2007 12:04 am

    ‘”We may have to,” Mitchell said and, at last, burped.BR/The curtains fluttered’BR/BR/LOL! Great detail, Susan!

  14. Sandy Carlson

    November 26, 2007 1:40 am

    This is great. There’s an interesting tension between the guys on the sectional and Kerri. I’ll be back for more! God bless.

  15. Y

    November 26, 2007 2:13 am

    LOL, loved it. I haven’t had that beached whale feeling in a while… i remember it all to well this year. *g*

  16. Thomma Lyn

    November 26, 2007 5:09 am

    LOL! I enjoyed this. And I must confess, I feel like a beached whale after this Thanksgiving weekend! 😀

  17. gautami tripathy

    November 26, 2007 9:16 am

    Reading this, I am hungry..BR/BR/:D

  18. Rhian

    November 26, 2007 9:27 am

    ps – your blog loading problem DOES seem to be eliminated!

  19. Missy

    November 26, 2007 2:20 pm

    LOL Priceless!

  20. Red Garnier

    November 26, 2007 3:59 pm

    FUNNY, loved it as USUAL! LOL. 😉 Me want more.

  21. Jenny McB

    November 26, 2007 8:41 pm

    Why am I not surprised that the guys were on the couch while the women were cleaning up…Great writing.

  22. Christine d'Abo

    November 26, 2007 8:52 pm

    Brilliant Susan. I love reading your stuff so much!

  23. Lloyd Irving Bradbury

    November 26, 2007 10:59 pm

    Twobeached turkeys?

  24. Shelley Munro

    November 27, 2007 1:20 am

    LOL – loved it. I can certainly relate 🙂

  25. Susan Helene Gottfried

    November 27, 2007 9:40 am

    Oh, Lloyd, that’s a good one!!!

  26. Marcia (MeeAugraphie)

    November 28, 2007 1:50 pm


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