Fiction Outtake: Oreos (The Early Years)


What happens when you take the Poetry Train, the Weekend Wordsmith prompt, and a few hours to let ideas marinate? Read on…


Usually, Trevor hated Eric‘s girls. The guitarist liked them full of innocence and stars in their eyes, still able to believe that good things in life happened all the time. Eric liked girls who were like Mitchell had been before Trevor had and fixed him. Sadly, Eric wouldn’t let him near his girls. They couldn’t get some Trevor-fixing.

But this girl, this Patsy chick, was different. For one thing, she was a little bit older than Eric’s usual girls — she might have even been over the age of twenty. And while she was still pretty star-struck, every now and then, that glimmer would fade and Trevor could see the tiniest bit of a backbone. Maybe even some cynicism.

Of all of Eric’s girls, this one had the most potential.

She caught up to them as they were assembling in the hotel lobby, bags in tow, ready to head over to the venue for sound check. “Do you guys need me to pick up anything?” she asked. Trevor closed his eyes; she had the smoothest Southern drawl. It reminded him of some of those old movies he’d watch late at night when the high from the show hadn’t worn off yet.

“You could pick me up,” Trevor said, bracing himself for some physical commentary from Mitchell. The girl was, after all, Eric’s.

“I was thinking,” she said, “of anything you might need from the grocery, for the bus.” She screwed up her face, like she was sorting through possibilities. “Staple things, like toothpaste. Maybe someone left their comb behind, or needs some Pop Tarts. That sort of thing.”

“That’s not as much fun as I am,” Trevor said, still waiting for Mitchell. The big idiot only hid a chuckle behind a glower; the guy was not in a good mood. Which was why Trevor kept waiting for the guy to smack him.

“Maybe,” the girl said, sounding so vanilla and boring, Trevor immediately lost interest.

“Oreos,” Daniel said suddenly. “Four packs of ’em.”

“Done,” she said. She kissed Eric and left.

Oh yeah, Trevor thought, watching her ass puff up each side of her skirt as she strode out of the lobby, her backless shoes flapping against the soles of her feet in a way that made him hard. A woman on a mission’s a hot creature, indeed. Even if she was boring and vanilla and maybe not so far from Eric’s usual gaggle of innocents.

She showed up near the end of soundcheck, one of those cutie tote bags in one hand. Trevor hoped the Oreos were in there; until Daniel had said the word, he hadn’t thought much about the simple comfort of a store-bought cookie. Maybe he ought to tell Daniel or Mitchell to add cookies to their catering rider.

“I can’t stay,” she said when Eric jumped down off the stage and removed the four packages of Oreos from the cutie tote bag. “I got called in to work to cover for someone. I’ll make the show, though.” She gave him a kiss that was more of a peck than anything romantic and was gone just that fast.

Good thing, Trevor thought, as the guys stampeded for the dressing room and barricaded the door shut. If Charlie, their tour manager, found out about the Oreos, he’d be there. As if feeding the tour manager was on the list of band duties.

Eric was one of those geeks who unscrewed the cookie and licked the filling out. Daniel nibbled at them slowly, almost sucking on them. Trevor liked to take his own sweet time with them, the way you’d handle a really exceptional woman.

And then there was Mitchell. The big idiot stuck them in his mouth whole, chewed, and swallowed just enough to have room for the next. He snarfed an entire package in the time Trevor ate ten cookies. You’d have thought the guy was being starved or something and this was his first meal after being released from some cage he’d been kept in.

He stood up, flapping at his gold t-shirt to get the crumbs off. How he managed to get full of crumbs when he didn’t take a bite of the stupid cookies was beyond Trevor, but that was Mitchell for you.

Trevor silently counted down from five. He noticed that Daniel was counting along with him, equally as silent, although the drummer’s lips were moving.

When they hit one, Mitchell let out a burp that shook the entire room. It was one of those that came from somewhere so deep, it was surprising that the guy’s guts didn’t come up with it. Good thing it stayed down: Trevor didn’t want to see half-chewed Oreo come up.

“Know what I need now?” Mitchell asked the guys.

“Milk,” they all answered in unison.

Trevor shook his head. “We are so fucking pathetic, it’s scary.”

Mitchell grinned and winked. “Just so that door’s locked, no one needs to know. Who’s got a few extra?”

Trevor hugged the remains of his Oreos to his chest. “Go find your own girl who’ll buy you some,” he said. Eric and Daniel quickly agreed.

Mitchell shrugged and slipped out of the dressing room. In search of milk, in search of more cookies… Trevor didn’t know. He didn’t particularly care, either. Just so long as the big idiot stayed out of his stash.



  1. RomanceWriter

    September 23, 2007 5:46 pm

    Fun story. I like the last sentence.

  2. Breeni

    September 23, 2007 6:08 pm

    Hehe, I eat Oreos like Mitchell. The other ways take too much time.

  3. bunnygirl

    September 23, 2007 6:45 pm

    Oreos are a sort of touchstone of American culture. What you think of them and how you eat them says volumes.BR/BR/And yeah, you gotta have milk. Even if it makes you pathetic. 🙂

  4. Amy Ruttan

    September 23, 2007 7:15 pm

    LOL! That was great, although, now I am craving them like crazy and I’m on a diet.

  5. Susan Helene Gottfried

    September 23, 2007 8:02 pm

    Then, Amy, I shouldn’t tell you that I just got back from having a brownie sundae that was bigger than my head. The remnants are now in the freezer here at home, for next month’s brownie/fudge craving…

  6. Bonnie Jacobs

    September 23, 2007 9:21 pm

    Thanks for sharing with Weekend Wordsmith again … I’ve got your link posted.

  7. Robin

    September 24, 2007 2:16 am

    A bunch of rockers gorging on milk and cookies, I love it.BR/BR/Personally though, I’d skip the milk.

  8. November Rain

    September 24, 2007 7:07 am

    I like my oreos with milkBR/BR/then I dunk and nibble but when I have no milk I am a twist top off geek LOLBR/BR/BR/Love the writing

  9. Rhian / Crowwoman

    September 24, 2007 7:53 am

    this was fun Susan. Typical Trevor irony when he tells Mitchell to get his own girl to get more Oreos, given that it wasn’t “his” girl that got Trevor’s.BR/BR/i like breaking ’em open and scraping the cream out with my teeth. wonder what that says about me. wonder if there is an oreo personality test.

  10. Wylie Kinson

    September 24, 2007 8:59 am

    Rockers and Oreos. Obvious combination, don’tcha think ;)BR/BR/Great story.

  11. gautami tripathy

    September 24, 2007 11:16 am

    What a story! Last sentence clinches it!

  12. Sparky Duck

    September 24, 2007 11:27 am

    Sounds like Trevor is growing up a little bit. Scary I know

  13. Susan Helene Gottfried

    September 24, 2007 11:30 am

    I think he’s incapable of growing up, Sparky.

  14. julia

    September 24, 2007 1:03 pm

    My husband eats Big Macs the way Mitchell eats Oreos. Well, it takes him three bites, but it is a Big Mac. This excerpt was fascinating in how the manner in which they all ate their Oreos was so telling. Really enjoyed it, Susan! (now I want Oreos)

  15. Rhian / Crowwoman

    September 24, 2007 1:15 pm

    Susan! How did i miss that you were preggers? (RE: Amy blog / your comment).BR/BR/How far along? Are you gonna name him Trevor if it’s a boy? I think you should have a blog contest on the naming of your baby.BR/BR/Shame on you for letting us find out via a side comment on someone else’s blog. (Yeah, that’s me scolding you…)

  16. Red Garnier

    September 24, 2007 1:50 pm

    ROFL!! Those two really make me laugh. And Oreos . . . damn, this diet is making me dream of them. LOL!

  17. Rhian / Crowwoman

    September 24, 2007 2:31 pm

    oh sorry – it was Wylie’s wine post – not Amy’s!

  18. Anna J. Evans

    September 24, 2007 2:44 pm

    You do such great dude, Susan. I love reading your boy POVs, I really feel like I’m in the head of some of the men I’ve known, lol.BR/BR/Anna J. Evans

  19. Jill

    September 24, 2007 3:03 pm

    Sorry that I didn’t visit your blog as much as usual since September start. I start working again and with 3 karate pratices a week, not much time for blogging!!BR/Did the guys saves me a couple of Oreos??

  20. Susan Helene Gottfried

    September 24, 2007 3:21 pm

    Rhi, I’m about as pregnant as Trevor. BR/BR/The reflux is a lasting legacy the little one left me with. (I’d say that’s all, but that is NOT all. Not by a longshot. That kid cost me my health; she damn well better be the Messiah.)

  21. Dewey

    September 24, 2007 5:35 pm

    Oreo quiz:'s what it says about Mitchell:BR/BR/1. The whole thing:BR/This means you consume life with abandon, you are fun to be with, exciting, carefree with some hint of recklessness. You are totally irresponsible. No one should trust you with their children

  22. Susan Helene Gottfried

    September 24, 2007 8:20 pm

    Gee, Dew, and here I was going for straight gluttony.BR/BR/What’s funny about that assessment is that of the two (Mitchell and Trevor), M’s the responsible one!

  23. Ann

    September 24, 2007 8:44 pm

    Great post. Mmmm, Oreos (insert Homeric drool here). And me with no cookies (oreos with iced coffee are quite fun). 🙂

  24. Amy Ruttan

    September 24, 2007 9:35 pm

    Aw man Brownie fudge. Growl, there goes my stomach. Think I’ll much on some broccoli *snort*

  25. Bernie

    September 25, 2007 12:46 am

    Oreos, I can’t get enough of them… I especially like the Chocolate filled cream version… YUM!!!BR/BR/Thanks for stopping by A HREF=”” REL=”nofollow”burntofferings/A and more at A HREF=”” REL=”nofollow”bernies fotoblog/A, I have a new post up at home with the Spring flowers here at work!

  26. Danika / OpenChannel

    September 25, 2007 4:25 am

    What a fun challenge and your take on it was great, too – may have to drop into the weekend wordsmith myself.BR/BR/I love how one word can take us in a direction we might never gone in otherwise. Very cool.

  27. Camille Alexa

    September 25, 2007 5:29 am

    Milk. Definitely.

  28. Seeley deBorn

    September 25, 2007 11:19 am

    Like a bunch of little boys. They are adorable!

  29. Joy Renee

    September 25, 2007 3:20 pm

    just as i suspected, they’re all a bunch of little boys at heart. 🙂

  30. Nancy

    September 27, 2007 11:11 am

    we get the Newman’s Own Oreo’s. Which are not like the real ones but my son cannot eat them. Corn syrup city in there.BR/BR/Nice job. So what is up w. this girl? I wanna know more.

  31. paisley

    September 30, 2007 9:11 am

    well i took me a week but i finally made it over… i love this little play by play,, i feel ever so the voyeur!!!

  32. West of Mars » Blog Archive » Thursday Thirteen: Cookies

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