Fiction Outtake: This one’s for us girls! (Post-Trevor’s Song era)


Mitchell wasn’t having much luck reading his guitar magazine. He knew it was stupid to sit at the kitchen table and try to read in the first place, but Kerri wasn’t helping matters any.

She was pacing around the cooking area, stopping to open the pantry, the refrigerator, the cabinets. She’d move things around, dig a bit in the freezer for something near the back, close everything up again, and move on to the next spot.

Over and over.

She was on her twelfth circuit when he’d had enough.

“Woman, what the fuck are you doing?”

“I need chocolate. I can’t believe we don’t have any chocolate. Why is there no chocolate in this house?” she asked as she took every single thing off one of the pantry shelves.

Mitchell got up to take a look at the things she was putting on the floor. Pancake mix, syrup, cans of tuna, corn starch — that was the sort of stuff he was expecting to see. And he supposed he remembered picking up that bottle of Big Buck’s Bodacious Sauce the last time he’d been at a Big Buck’s for some ribs.

But when it came to things like a dry scone mix, a paper cup of corn chowder that needed to have water added before it was anything but powder, and six varieties of balsamic vinegar, all he could do was scratch his head. Some of it he could blame on Val, who loved to force her gourmet finds on them. Some of it might have come from Nancy, and some of it… who knew? Maybe one of Amy’s jokes again?

“Ker,” he asked softly as she growled and started putting things back, “where’d some of this come from?”

She looked at the can of baby bay shrimp in her hand. “You know,” she said slowly, “I have no clue. And you know what else?” she asked, fixing him with a stare that was so bright, it made him wince. “I don’t care. It’s not chocolate and that is what this is about. Where the fuck is the chocolate?”

He thought fast. The boys were still with Nancy; he had time before she’d want to leave for the day. He could pull this off — if he moved now.

Mitchell grabbed Kerri by the shoulders and turned her toward the door leading to the garage. “Come with me,” he said.


She tried to resist, so he bent and slung her over his shoulder.

“I’m taking you out and we’re buying out every single peanut butter cup the store’s got. What doesn’t make you puke in an hour’s going into the freezer.”


When she struggled, he set her down as gently as he could, worried that the way she was moving, she’d hurt herself. Or, worse, he’d hurt her.

“I don’t want peanut butter cups. I want…” She licked her lips, her eyes roaming the ceiling. “I want brownies.”

“I think I saw a box on the floor.”

Kerri looked at him, her hazel eyes twinkling. “Race ya to ’em.”

“Nah, you go. Call me when they’re done.” He started to stroll off, but she tackled him. Thankfully, not hard enough to bring him down, but hard enough to knock some of his wind out. He gave her a scornful look over his shoulder.

“You’re eating?” she asked. “Then you’re helping bake.”

“Only if I get to smear batter on you and lick it off.”

“Nope,” she said calmly, picking the box of mix up off the floor.

“You do it to me?” he asked hopefully. “Would that be chocolate enough for ya?”

She pressed up against him and gave him one of those infuriating closed-lipped kisses. “Try it and see. But… after we bake these puppies and I’ve had a few.”

Mitchell frowned as she tore into the box. She peered inside, looking so cute he wanted to melt, then with a sheepish smile read the back for the cooking directions.

“You know,” he drawled, ready to break and run before she could throw something at him, “in two days, you’ll be telling me to take what’s left over to the studio because you don’t want to gain three pounds just by breathing in their scent.”

“You know,” she answered, cocking her head slightly, “you could forget about that smearing batter thing, get out of my sight, and let me enjoy my brownies in peace, motherfucker.”

Mitchell decided that even Trevor wasn’t enough of a fool to hang around after that charming invite. He grabbed his guitar magazine and headed out onto the back porch. Anything to avoid the evil brownie fumes; Kerri would find a way to curse him so he gained three pounds, he was sure of it.

Be sure to pick up a copy of The Demo Tapes: Year 1 at your favorite retailer:



  1. cheesygiraffe

    May 8, 2006 7:38 pm

    I love it! :DBR/I’ve had those chocolate moments myself. I think I may be wanting some chocolate for dessert tonight. Thanks! LOL

  2. Susan Helene Gottfried

    May 8, 2006 7:50 pm

    Babe, if you could see the pan sitting on my stove… Kerri’s not the only one who was jonesing for brownies!

  3. Penina

    May 8, 2006 8:35 pm

    OH, if there is a woman alive who cannot identify with that scene, then they have to give back their ‘union’ card!

  4. nimrodiel

    May 9, 2006 2:17 pm

    I had a brownie jones myself that flopped.BR/BR/They turned out too gooey, and while it hit that chocolate spot, it’s not the same eating a brownie off a spoon…

  5. Susan Helene Gottfried

    May 9, 2006 5:07 pm

    I made Passover brownies that came out way too gooey like that, so I know exactly what you are talking about. Yick!

  6. Janelle Martin

    May 11, 2006 10:55 am

    Me, I’m more a fudge girl or peanut butter cups but I can so relate to tearing apart the house seeking chocolate.BR/BR/Mitchell was a wise man to get out of the way when his woman was on a chocolate mission.

  7. Susan Helene Gottfried

    May 11, 2006 11:07 am

    The Tour Manager buys a separate bag of peanut butter cups every year at Halloween. He puts them directly into our freezer in the basement and we indulge as needed. BR/BR/That’s where the end of my dark chocolate MMs are, too. BR/BR/As for Mitchell, he’s got two older sisters; he knows when to head for cover!

  8. MarciNYC

    May 18, 2006 9:40 pm

    Mmmmm…. chocolate. Another great scene. I’m enjoying the ride– keep it coming!@

  9. MarciNYC

    June 7, 2006 1:19 pm

    The question is still burning in my brain — is it Bdark/B chocolate in those brownies?

  10. cheesygiraffe

    June 7, 2006 9:27 pm

    I want the recipe if it is dark chocolate brownies!

  11. Susan Helene Gottfried

    June 7, 2006 9:31 pm

    We’ll have to ask Val Huong, Daniel’s girlfriend (hopefully you recall that Daniel is ShapeShifter’s very classically handsome drummer with the curly brown hair the color of a Hershey bar). I’ve never seen a dark chocolate brownie mix (feel free to re-educate me), but maybe finding a recipe ought to be added to my To Do list, huh? *wink*

  12. MarciNYC

    June 8, 2006 6:10 am

    Oh — there BIS/B a dark chocolate brownie mix. A certain someone has a few boxes in her pantry. Although, like the caramel (not turtle) brownies, it’s rather elusive. Mmm… Wonder if a care package needs to be sent WoM?

  13. Susan Helene Gottfried

    June 8, 2006 7:50 am

    There IS a mix? BR/BR/Yes, darling, maybe a care package DOES need to be sent this way… only because you’re a friend, though. (I dread the day that I’ll stop by the PO Box and it’ll be full of presents from my groupies!)BR/BR/A care package like that might even inspire me to post some pictures…

  14. nimrodiel

    June 8, 2006 10:07 am

    I know I’ve seen Ghiredeli Dark CHocolate brownie mix on the rare occasion. Though I don’t use the mixes all that much anymore, since I like knowing what’s in them and being able to control ingredients.BR/BR/*shrug* Plus I like doing things from scratch. If you have all the ingredients gathered before you start it’s not much more work than throwing a mix together.BR/BR/Today’s fun I think will be a lemon cake as a late birthday bit of fun for a friend whom we celebrated with last weekend but went out for fondue which doesn’t really have cake, just cake bits.

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