Mitchell Fiction: Naked (The Early Years)


Mom alert: Some grown-up words in this one, and if you didn’t guess, some nudity, too. It’s fiction; it’s all good.

It wasn’t turning into a good afternoon. Mitchell had been over at the Owenses’ house, trying to mow their lawn. Trying; they’d left Sarge, their German Shepard, outside, and he’d either stick himself between Mitchell’s legs or else he’d laid down in the mower’s path, tongue lolling as if he was laughing. Because, of course, Mitchell couldn’t mow over the dog, much as he wanted to.

He got home hot and crabby, disgusted to hear that Amy had her friend Valerie over again. They were in Amy’s room, the door was open, and Mitchell could hear them giggling and laughing. Just like usual. They’d never learn.

He shucked off his sweaty t-shirt and shorts; the socks and shoes had gone even before he’d entered the house. The underwear absolutely had to follow; there was nothing worse than sweaty underwear. It chafed.

The towel he’d left in his room had, of course, been stolen by Trevor. That meant he had to…

Mitchell grinned. Amy’s door was wide open. Amy’s door was between Mitchell’s room and the bathroom. And nothing or no one could go past Amy’s room without her looking out. This was going to be beautiful. Better than usual.

Sure enough, as he strolled past, the girls shrieked, then Amy wailed, “Mom! Mitchell’s naked in front of Valerie again!”

He stopped, of course, and came back to stand just within view. “You left the door open,” he told them.

“So? That doesn’t give you the right to go parading around the house naked.”

“I’m not parading anywhere, you fucking princess–”


“I’m going to take a shower,” Mitchell continued, ignoring her latest screech. Ma wasn’t going to get in the middle of this one, and if she did, it’d be to tell Amy to keep her bedroom door shut already.

“Why can’t you shower at normal times, you loser?”

Mitchell took a step closer, all too aware that Valerie was checking him out. So far as he knew, Valerie didn’t have any brothers. This was probably good stuff for her. “If someone in this house wouldn’t hog the bathroom for a good half-hour every morning, maybe I could get in there before school.”

Amy shut her mouth, cutting off whatever she’d been about to say.

“And if that same someone,” he continued, taking another step forward, “would shut her fucking flap every time I try to take a shower before bed, I’d do it then.”

“Going to bed with wet hair–” Amy started, but Mitchell held a hand up.

Amy recoiled.

“Got a whiff, huh?” Mitchell asked, lifting his entire arm. “While you were in here, giggling over guys in magazines and proving I’m right that you don’t have a brain in there,” he said, tapping Amy in the forehead, “I was out, working my butt off and trying not to mow Sarge. While you two were in here, dreaming about your stupid weddings, I was out there, working to make my dreams come true. You don’t like the results, shut your fucking door.”

He surprised even himself when he pushed Amy back into her room and leaned in to grab the door and shut it himself. In the back of his mind, he could hear Trevor nodding with approval, but he felt like an idiot. Ma would kill him for touching Amy like that.

She flung her door open before he could close the door to the bathroom. “Oh, yeah?” she yelled, stalking down the hall toward him.

He ignored the impulse to shut the door in her face. Whatever she was about to say might be good.

“You think you’re hot shit, strutting around all naked like this, huh?”

He sighed. “Aim, what the fuck do you want?”

“I want… I want…” Her eyes darted back and forth as she tried to think on her
feet. Fortunately for Mitchell, she wasn’t very good at it. “I want you to leave me and Valerie alone!”

“I walked past your door, you egotistical bitch!”


Mitchell pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Calling for Mom like that’s only going to get you in trouble,” Trevor said from the other end of the hall. “And quit being jealous that your brother’s got all the family jewels and you’ve just got those teeny titties already, will you? Let the idiot go shower before I go and get naked on you. ‘Cause let me tell you, girls, if I go and do that, I’m not staying in this hallway, youknowwhatImean?”

Chuckling as the girls shrieked some more, Mitchell finally closed the bathroom door. That almost made up for that stupid dog laying down in front of the lawnmower. Even if it had taken Trevor to make it good.

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  1. karen!

    April 16, 2007 11:59 am

    Another fabulous outtake. BR/Keep up the good work!

  2. julia

    April 16, 2007 12:22 pm

    Glad to have my first look at your work. Pretty funny! Especially the dog in the way of the lawn mower.

  3. Tilly Greene

    April 16, 2007 1:51 pm

    HA! Have a I mentioned Trevor is fabulous?BR/BR/”And quit being jealous that your brother’s got all the family jewels and you’ve just got those teeny titties already, will you?”BR/BR/Good laugh 🙂

  4. Dana

    April 16, 2007 6:49 pm

    Really great!!!!!!!!!!!

  5. bunnygirl

    April 16, 2007 7:49 pm

    Fun passage! Maybe being a decade older than my sibs wasn’t so bad, after all!

  6. Amy Ruttan

    April 16, 2007 8:27 pm

    I voted for you! I voted for you!!!BR/BR/Thanks for the birthday wishes. Somehow I knew you were and April baby as well, funny.

  7. cheesygiraffe

    April 16, 2007 9:46 pm

    Mitchell naked?! *drool*

  8. Susan Helene Gottfried

    April 16, 2007 9:59 pm

    How did I know you’d like this one, Cheeze?BR/BR/And again, guys, thanks for the votes!

  9. Sophisticated Writer

    April 17, 2007 8:38 am

    Mitchell is a lot of fun. What else can I say?BR/BR/And Amy, stop whining!

  10. L^2

    April 17, 2007 1:40 pm

    LOL that’s hilarious!

  11. Sanni

    April 17, 2007 3:00 pm

    HA! Thanks so much for the fabulous outtake – I´m still laughing! BR/BR/Love it! Need it! =)

  12. Susan Helene Gottfried

    April 17, 2007 3:14 pm

    Need it, Sanni?

  13. Rashenbo

    April 17, 2007 3:42 pm

    I’ve got to catch up and see all the goodies that have happened while I’ve been away!!!! 🙂 Love the little trip through… NAKED years 🙂

  14. West Of Mars — The Meet and Greet » Blog Archive » 100 Words: Corn

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