Poetry Train: Inside Unforgettable


I am the prompt queen today. Writer’s Island is all about Unforgettable things. Weekend Wordsmith is Inside. And me, I’m doing a poem for the Poetry Train. Yee haw.

Inside Unforgettable


of fear
of joy
of anticipation
of realization


Bright lights beckon
Lines intimidate
Fingers gone to prunes
Sopping towels
Lost lounge chairs

Retreat to the hotel room
for a nap
for dry clothes
for food

Back in bathing suits

Hit the water park again.

Yep, the kids are off school for conferences and we’re joining a bunch of friends — and half the Cub Scout den — up in Erie PA for what’s promising to be some unforgettable fun at an indoor water park. See everyone in a few!



  1. Rhian

    November 4, 2007 10:33 pm

    wahoo! i love it Susan!!! Ending snuck up and grabbed me by surprise. I hang out with too many erotic authors apparently.

  2. Ann

    November 4, 2007 11:33 pm

    Have fun! Sounds like a blast.

  3. julia

    November 5, 2007 12:03 am

    Wonderful Susan poem! Loved it!BR/BR/”Fingers gone to prunesBR/Sopping towelsBR/Lost lounge chairs”BR/BR/I’ve lived that. These lines bring it all back. Have fun in PA!

  4. Danika / OpenChannel

    November 5, 2007 12:42 am

    I haven’t been to a water park in years! I wonder where the closest one is to Vancouver, BC? BR/BR/Come over and play my poetry game.

  5. Missy

    November 5, 2007 1:08 am

    This is a great poem! I love it!

  6. Robin

    November 5, 2007 3:38 am

    What a great, unexpected ending. Love it.

  7. Lila

    November 5, 2007 4:45 am

    Awesome, way to multi-task!

  8. gautami tripathy

    November 5, 2007 8:03 am

    “Lines intimidateBR/Fingers gone to prunes”BR/BR/I am imagining that!

  9. Lisa Andel

    November 5, 2007 9:40 am

    Wow, I’m first. That’s weird. Where’s your Linkey?BR/BR/Water park. For some reason this cold weather makes me so glad I’m not going to one.

  10. Tempest Knight

    November 5, 2007 11:14 am

    WOOOHOO! Have fun at the park!

  11. Rhian

    November 5, 2007 2:57 pm

    errr – Lisa, i was channeling you when i stopped by so technically you WERE first. sorta. Sorry – lame save. I tried.

  12. MyUtopia

    November 5, 2007 4:24 pm

    Waterparks rock!

  13. Susan Helene Gottfried

    November 5, 2007 4:37 pm

    You guys were all first ’cause I was too busy being frustrated at my kids to moderate comments. Not to mention our in-room Internet didn’t work.

  14. Sparky Duck

    November 5, 2007 7:24 pm

    Indoor water park has got to be something. Something full of germs and screaming banshees, but see thats something

  15. Amy Ruttan

    November 5, 2007 8:16 pm

    Have fun. I love slipping and sliding down water slides. Hey Erie, you’re just right across the lake from Mois!

  16. Anne Douglas

    November 5, 2007 9:57 pm

    I never made it to the water park this year :(BR/BR/Have fun Susan, don’t get sunburned!

  17. Joy Renee

    November 6, 2007 7:08 am

    oh, what fun!BR/you put me right there:BR/where’s my towel i got water streaming outta my hair into my eyes.BR/BR/thanx for visiting.BR/hey did you notice i finally figured out how to get the WOM groupie thingy in my sidebar and linked to boot. took me long enough tho.

  18. Mary Timme

    November 6, 2007 10:04 am

    Neat fun day! I remember those and being sunburned to a crisp!

  19. writerwoman

    November 6, 2007 1:01 pm

    Have fun! It sounds exhausting to me. 🙂

  20. Hedwyg

    November 6, 2007 1:09 pm

    Oh, what fun! I was SO there! 🙂

  21. Sophisticated Writer

    November 6, 2007 3:23 pm

    Susan: I miss you so much dear. Sorry, I haven’t been around lately. Read my blog for more.BR/BR/I really like that poem, Susan. Wow.BR/BR/I want to go to a water park too, like right now 😛

  22. tumblewords

    November 6, 2007 4:05 pm

    What fun! Fingers gone to prunes – a cute and truthful phrase!

  23. Jill

    November 7, 2007 9:30 am

    You have been the last site that I’ve put up for checking like for the last week, and I always felt asleep before checking it! Sorry Susan!!BR/I want to go to a water park!! And that would say that it is warmer than here right now!!!!

  24. Just Jen

    November 7, 2007 10:06 pm

    Considering it snowed where I am today, I’m very jealous! Enjoy yourself!

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