Susan’s Monday Poetry: Help!


I am being held
in my own home
by my children
I swear,
have been taught
Advanced Torture Techniques
by their friends.

Don’t forget to check out the other writings at Rhian‘s Poetry Train! Jump on board!



  1. Robin L. Rotham

    May 28, 2007 1:44 pm

    Whoa, can I ever relate to this, LOL! My youngest, especially, is already a pro at making me scream for mercy.

  2. Rhian / Crowwoman

    May 28, 2007 3:04 pm

    Holy cow! Between you and Emily I’m snorting my BLT while choking on laughter! Awesome poem!

  3. Ann

    May 28, 2007 3:10 pm

    Great poem. Thanks for the laugh.

  4. Emily Veinglory

    May 28, 2007 3:16 pm

    I imagine it written on a crumpled piece of paper tossed out an attic window…

  5. Dewey

    May 28, 2007 3:33 pm

    My kid’s FRIENDS THEMSELVES are using the advanced torture techniques. They’ve been told that they may not come over til 2 weeks after my surgery. Yet they keep calling several times a day and asking my son if they can come over. DO NO OTHER PARENTS BUT ME TEACH BOUNDARIES RESPECT ANY MORE?????

  6. Chris

    May 28, 2007 3:48 pm

    Very funny!

  7. Thomma Lyn

    May 28, 2007 5:17 pm

    HEE!! Love the poem.

  8. karen!

    May 28, 2007 6:35 pm

    I was going to say “But, it’s not Monday yet” until I realized that it actually is. It’s amazing how a long, holiday weekend can confuse you. BR/BR/Anyway, great poem.

  9. Joy Renee

    May 28, 2007 7:23 pm

    lol. sparked memories of certain babysitting jobs, memories that haunt my nightmares to this day.BR/BR/this is my first ride on the Monday Poetry Train:

  10. Rashenbo

    May 28, 2007 9:35 pm

    LOL! Considering I just spent 13 hours in the car with my children after an entire week with them in a tiny one bedroom apartment… I feel your PAIN. “Mom, she’s touching me.” “Mom, she’s got her head on my pillow.” “Mom, She ate the last fruit roll up!”BR/BR/I imagine the words scratched upon the sole of a shoe and then tossed over a fence – much like an empty bottle floating in the sea… the poor shoe with its tearful message sits forlorn on the curb… *sob* It was a good shoe too.

  11. Penina

    May 28, 2007 9:45 pm

    OH YEAH!BR/BR/This is the Mommy’s National Anthem, or at least it should be.

  12. cheesygiraffe

    May 29, 2007 8:28 am

    I agree with Penina. It should be the Mommy’s National Anthem. 😉

  13. Anna J. Evans

    May 29, 2007 8:32 am

    GOD!!! YES!!!BR/BR/The three year old and 12 year old are okay–though demanding. But 8 makes me beg for mercy–or a strong drink–at least once a day.BR/BR/Is summer almost over yet?BR/BR/Hugs, great poem!!BR/BR/anna

  14. Andrew

    May 29, 2007 12:20 pm

    The last three lines…LOL! Just don’t feed them sugar, Susan, and they’ll get tired in only a few days. 😀

  15. Amy Ruttan

    May 29, 2007 7:00 pm

    LOL!!!!!!BR/BR/Ya, me too. Then I go to the EDJ and the Lawyers there are like children, so I get it 24 /7.

  16. littlebirdblue

    May 29, 2007 7:35 pm

    It’s like ‘letter in a bottle’ poetry.

  17. Anne Douglas

    May 29, 2007 9:17 pm

    ROFLBR/BR/You’re in Florida and the Kids are off school now are they?BR/BR/Mine is. It’s only been one day, and they’ve extended the holidays this year to go onto the same timetable as northern schools (starting later in Aug not early Aug).BR/BR/I think I might head to the doc and get him to refill not only the wellbutrin but add in a side of Xanax.

  18. julia

    May 29, 2007 9:40 pm

    “Help!BR/I am being held BR/PrisonerBR/in my own home BR/by my children”BR/BR/Emily Veinglory, your image of the paper tossed from the window added a whole other dimension to it!BR/BR/Compact and poignant even within the humour. Keep ’em coming, Susan.

  19. Alyssa Goodnight

    May 29, 2007 11:57 pm

    Good one! I can relate, particularly now that summer has officially started…


    May 30, 2007 1:12 am

    LOL!!! I’m late but had to comment on this awesome poem!! Great job, Susan!

  21. Katkat

    May 30, 2007 8:01 am

    I think my son has been taught that too. lol great poem!

  22. scooper

    May 30, 2007 9:29 am

    Are my kids over there?

  23. spyscribbler

    May 30, 2007 11:43 am

    Oh! That is FUNNY! And so TRUE! Thanks for the great poem!

  24. Marcia (MeeAugraphie)

    May 30, 2007 5:49 pm

    Ok, find a melody writer to put this to music so we an all sing it together to our kids — repeatedly.

  25. RomanceWriter

    June 5, 2007 1:52 am

    LOL. I have been there.

  26. writerwoman

    October 2, 2007 12:15 pm

    LMAO. I love this one.

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