Maybe it’s time to define DEFINITIVE

No, this isn’t the editor in me raising her head, teeth bared in a snarl. It’s just that word came down earlier this month that there’s going to be ANOTHER definitive biography of Metallica.

Anyone mind if I yawn?

Maybe there’s hope for this one, as it’s purported to be penned (like my alliteration there?) by Paul Brannigan and Ian Winwood. According to the article at Blabbermouth, these two have been permitted “unparalleled” access. No word on ugly sweaters and not-so-camouflaged attempts to join the band.

They’re also promising never-before-told stories, but … c’mon. We’ve heard THAT before, too. And this is Metallica. Am I really supposed to drool at the thought of tales of hard drinking? Bed-hopping? Drugs? Fist fights?

I’m jaded. I’ll admit it. I’ll hold my drool until the reviews start rolling in. Unless I’m asked to write one of those reviews, at which point I’ll be drooling more over the opportunity than over the book itself.

Yawn.

Pardon me. I feel a nap coming on.