I won’t bore you with the chain of events, but suffice it to say I’m taking an antibiotic that’s just making me want to make like Mitchell, in this outtake. (He’s so much fun to pick on!)

So I spent yesterday on the couch with the Olympics on and the laptop sucking me in. That means that today’s the first day I’ve been able to fire up my XM Online and listen to the temporary Metallica channel.

I was right when I said sitting here would be easy and getting up to go to the bathroom would be hard. I’m also a bit concerned that there’s soon going to be food caked everywhere on my desk and carpet… you get the idea.

If you’re not as addicted as I am, you might want to check this out. I got an e-mail from Sneak Attack Media, telling me about this cool indie flick they’re showing online. It’s called Dig! and I can hardly wait to sit and watch it, myself.

Once October comes, and my all-Metallica XM channel is no more.

Of course.

Thirteen things the fans treasure Admit it. You have a shelf, or a box, or a wall, or a closet full of stuff that you keep only because it came from your favorite band. Some things are universal to all bands. Others are specific to our favorite fictional band, ShapeShifter. See how many you have — or how many you wish you have. 1. Anything autographed and yes, it’s true that the boys will autograph anything. Guitars, CD booklets, clothes, and bodies. For the girls, bras are popular. For the guys, it’s their t-shirts. For the desperate with nothing else to have signed, it’s the backstage pass. 2. The autographs that are then turned into tattoos are treasures, but they probably won’t be worth money some day. 3. Any girl who’s played the Steal the Band’s Underwear have quite the treasure. Especially if they’re lucky enough to get something worn for more than five minutes. 4. Set lists. The most valuable of them are lifted right off the stage and still have gaffer’s tape on their edges. 5. Picks, drumsticks… the usual. It’s all customized by tour or event, of course, adding to the value. 6. Wolf Whistle t-shirts. At the end of every tour, the band plays a surprise show at local club All Access under the name Wolf Whistle. It’s usually announced the day before, and no line’s allowed to form until ten minutes before the doors are set to open. Getting in can be impossible. 7. Posters from the early shows. 8. Hell, anything from the early days. The first t-shirts. The demos. The flyers about early shows. Even the bootlegs. 9. T-shirts from special one-off shows, like the Musical Hanukkah Celebration. The only way to get these puppies is to be inside — or to have a friend who’s inside. 10. Magazines featuring the band. 11. Did I mention bootlegs? Audio, video, it’s both good. 12. Personal pictures with the guys. Again, these may not be worth much to anyone but you unless you’ve got a picture of you and a guy in a compromising position — and with Trevor, there is no such thing as a compromising position. 13. Ticket stubs. The unused old style ones or the new computer scanned are the best treasures, but sometimes, anything will do. Don’t know who ShapeShifter is? Click on the link and fix that; you’ll be taken to a bio page of the band. From there, you can click on the names of other characters who populate my fiction and/or this blog and explore my world. Come on. You know you can’t resist.

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things.
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I should have put the pieces together when my XM Radio was flooded with Metallica as we drove from here to points around Virginia, and back home again. I mean, I know how the Big Publicity Machine cranks up right before a band has a new CD to release. It’s fun to watch, particularly if you like the band.

And you guys know I like my Metallica. Okay, the last album, St. Anger. Let’s talk about that in one sentence: DOESN’T LIVE UP TO POTENTIAL. (sheesh, do I have report cards from when I was a kid that says the same thing. Am I in good company, or what?)

I’m hopeful that the new album won’t have this problem. I’d have to threaten to get on the case of the guy who I often think of as the inspiration for Roadie Poet, but he has nothing to do with the music Metallica makes. That would be a waste of my time. Not to mention his; I like him too much to do that to him.

Besides, I’m going to be rather busy come this Saturday, 16 August. I got word today that XM Radio is launching a Mandatory Metallica channel (51 for those of you whose eyes just lit up like mine did). It’ll run the whole way until 30 September, by which point I expect I might be all Metallica-ed out. Maybe. I mean, heck, why not? It’s not like they’re coming to my (lame) city before the end of January.

Writers often talk about “bum glue” (which is a phrase I hate because I hate the word bum when we’re talking about the good old tuchas. I mean, really. Why use bum when there’s this great Yiddish word to use instead??). Tuchas glue… that’s what we often need to make ourselves sit down and write.

Anyone want to place bets on how much I’ll get done with 45 days of Metallica, a definite stimulant to my muse, blaring away in here?

Scary thought, I know. Especially because the real question is how many bathroom breaks I’ll deny myself ’cause I just can’t tear myself away from the one millionth listening of Master of Puppets…

Yep, it’s that time of year again when you guys make me feel the warm fuzzies. You know, it’s hard to write scenes with Trevor in them when I’ve got the warm fuzzies. Trevor, as most of you know, is diametrically opposed to the warm fuzzies. (Between you and me, I think Trevor’s terrified of the warm fuzzies, but I don’t think any of you groupies are surprised by that.)

There are a ton of awards that have been directed not just at this blog, but at my Win a Book blog, too. Let me recap for you:

Allessandra at her place has given Win a Book the Brillante Award. She thanks us for helping her win new reads.

My dear friend Bob-kat has given me the SuperCommentor award. I think all you guys know how hard I try to say something of meaning, so this felt very good, indeed. Read what she had to say here.

More of that Brillante Award. My dear, dear friend Bunnygirl sent this one my way, and coming from her, that’s high praise. Once school starts for my kids, don’t be surprised if you hear more adventures of Susan and Bunnygirl…

Win a Book was actually awarded two more awards, but as they rolled in when I was about to roll off to Cub Scout Camp, I sent them to Breeni and asked her to acknowledge them on behalf of the WaB team.

I’d pass these along because I’ve met even more cool people of late and am dying to acknowledge them, but I’m also about to pop back out of town for another week. (Or I’m already there. You decide.) Once the summer travels are over and life settles down into a pre-school and kids’ birthday hubbub, I’ll see what I can do to make sure you know of the coolness that’s been entering my life.

Awards or no, know I’m grateful to all of you for hanging out with me. And Trevor. And the rest of the fictional folk who populate this place. I may be busy doing semi-interesting things right now, but it won’t last. The fictional gang are still more interesting than I am. That’s not going to change; it’s why I’m a writer.

Every time I try to write something for this week’s prompt, what I wind up with is too long. This is leading to the pleasant swelling of scenes I intend to post on this blog, treasures saved up for a day when inspiration runs low. But it’s also leading to the unpleasant problem of not having anything worthwhile this week. Since I took last week off, I really want to be able to play along this week, especially since I’ll be out of town for the next two weeks, which will make playing hard, as I’ll have no Net access…

Really. Once you get on my bad side, there’s not a lot of hope for you.

Which is why I had to point out that the Pittsburgh Hilton is having a bit of trouble paying their workers.

This Hilton, I’ve learned, is actually a franchise hotel. Its owners claim to be digging themselves out of the financial hole they got themselves into. But the hotel still bears the Hilton name and a franchise or not, it’s still the Hilton company who looks bad. ‘Cause you can’t tell me that the other three Hilton-named hotels I’ve had crappy experiences in were franchises, too. If so, then the Hiltons really ought to consider who they’re letting buy in. I meant it when I said I was done staying at anything bearing the Hilton name.

I know that every single person at the Romantic Times Convention here in Pittsburgh with me are joining me in an impassioned eye roll, snicker, and even, perhaps, a shudder of horror at the memories of that place.

A story in Thirteen parts 1. A few weeks ago, I posted about this website I’d found that listed fake bands. Seemed to me that ShapeShifter should be on there, but the site hadn’t been updated in almost a year. That goddess Winter went and contacted the dude, who said he’s still collecting band names (but it helps if he’s heard of them) but isn’t planning an update anytime soon. Well. 2. Many of you suggested that I make my own list of fake bands. Trevor won’t let me do that, though. Most of you guys know him. He may be fictional, but he’s an original, and he demands that the people around him be brave enough to be original, too. 3. I’d already been playing with this idea beforehand, so I went and made the time and … check it out. A list of Rock and Roll fiction. Yeah, you know. Not just bands, but books about bands. 4. I began by making a list of what’s on my shelves. Then I added in titles I’d run into in other places online. That added up to a long list. 5. As I kept looking around, I found more. You know how it is when you’re looking for a purple car. Suddenly, most of the cars on the road are purple. 6. You may have heard of some of these books, like Reservation Blues, by Sherman Alexie. Or Roddy Doyle’s The Commitments. 7. Maybe you’ve only heard of some of the authors, like Jay McInerney, who wrote Bright Lights, Big City. 8. The best-known might be Nick Hornby’s High Fidelity. 9. Lots of these books were written by people with music industry experience (like me). Check out my favorites, Don Bruns and David Hiltbrand. 10. Nope, I haven’t read all of them yet. Yes, I intend to! And no, I won’t tell which I’ve read and which I haven’t. (Well, okay, except for the above two. Sort of.) Some have been talked about on this blog, but you’ll have to go find them… 11. That means you should read them, too, and form your OWN opinion. I hear lots of complaints about cliches — do you see any? If so, where? (seriously. I want to know.) 12. If you know of any titles I’m missing, you know how to contact me. I’d like this list to be as complete as humanly possible. 13. All the buy links on my blog and website go to Powells. There are lots of reasons for this, but the least is that I get a cut if you buy anything. My plan with that piece of the action is to return it to you via giveaways. I’d love to start doing that, you know… See the list!

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

As Lisa noticed, no Poetry Train from me. I was sort of hoping I wouldn’t get to this point until next week, but here I am.

Here’s the deal. Like most writers at certain points, it’s time to step aside and deal with…

1. a short story I’m working on for submission. Yes, me, who was begged in graduate school to stop writing short stories because I’m so bad at them. It’s time to see if I’ve learned a thing or two, writing outtakes.

2. A project I’ve had in the wings for a long time now. After talking to some really cool people about it, I think I’m going to go ahead.

3. Straightening out the agent thing. This is one of those things that’s surprised me with how it’s played out. In April, I approached an agent with a proposal for Trevor’s Song. She was enthusiastic but wanted to discuss it further. She said the next day. I figured the next week, and I cleared my calendar.

Needless to say, I’m still waiting, and it’s been three and a half months. Phone calls aren’t being returned. Nor is e-mail. I’m thinking so much for that proposal and it’s time to do what Trevor would.

4. Some other projects I’ve been wanting to get to.

5. Finishing up the novel-in-progress. Man, I’ve been drafting it forever. It’s taken WAY too long, but not because of the blog.

and then there’s the personal stuff.

1. I am absolutely ADDICTED to the Tour de France. Addicted, I tell you.

2. I knew it was only a matter of time before this happened, but the conditions in my gym have deteriorated to the point where I had a full-blown asthma attack while doing a program that shouldn’t have had me breathing hard. It’s my first attack in five years. I’ve been making noises for two months now to the Tour Manager that this was inevitable. I’ve skipped working out some days to avoid reaching this point. It can’t be avoided any longer. Time to switch, most likely to the mondo snooty, cliquish, expensive place that’s sadly the only option.

3. It’s that time of year again! I am taking #1 to Cub Scout Camp again this year! If the idea of me in a snooty, cliquish, expensive health club isn’t enough to make you snort your Frosted Flakes out your nose, this ought to be. Me in a metal-frame tent with an oil cloth over it, a platform supporting it, and two cots (with mattresses) inside. Not to mention the latrine at campsite.

Now, stop laughing. I absolutely adore it.

4. After camp comes vacation. We’ll be staying in a very lovely looking B&B, and then moving to a cabin in a National Park. Yep, a return to the idea of going from the snooty to the rustic. I’m still loving it.

I’ll be here, off and on. Make sure you’ve got me in your reader, but stop back anyway ’cause my blog stats could use the love. The better my blog stats, the better my bragging rights about you guys to people who’ll come through in their ambition to get Trevor into print. Think of it that way.

See ya at some point I have yet to figure out…

The prompt this week at Sunday Scribblings is My Oldest Friend.

I’ve never been one to hold on to friends forever. The fact that the Tour Manager has been in my life as much as he has is, in and of itself, amazing. Yet we weren’t friends until about thirteen years ago. Or maybe we were; who can really tell among all that teenage angst and jockeying for popularity and the right crowd?

I suppose it makes sense, then, that this is an issue that I see within my fictional band, ShapeShifter. The four men who make up the band are friends onstage and off. It all began when a shy kid named Mitchell Voss met the outlandish abused outcast, Trevor Wolff. (You can read this episode here on the blog or here as a cleaned-up, downloadable .pdf file. Your pick.)

Trevor had a vision. Mitchell had a guitar. ShapeShifter was born.

(This is one of my favorite posts about the two of them.)

In due time, Eric and Daniel were brought into the fold. Yes, this was the band’s original lineup and yes, it’s the lineup in the band’s adventures here on the blog. It’s also part of the crux of Trevor’s Song, my on-the-market novel that this blog was originally designed to support.

There are other relationships lurking in my fiction. Daniel has had the same girlfriend since he was sixteen. Her name is Val and you can meet her here and here, among other places (click on her name to find them). I love playing with Val because she’s so different from our other long-term woman in the place, Mitchell’s love, Kerri. One of these days, I’ll do even more with the Daniel-Val relationship. Daniel and Val have grown up together; their relationship is complex, a little bit twisted and maybe even a little bit tragic. Yet they endure.

There are other relationships bubbling around my fictional world, too. Music writer Chelle LaFleur has a crush on Mitchell (and who in her right mind doesn’t? He’s a dashing, romantic sort of guy with charisma out the very cute wazoo) — and has since she first saw them driving into town in his dad’s Ford Bronco with a U-Haul on back. Read about it here — and marvel with me at how Chelle’s voice has evolved.

Notice how much of this revolves around Mitchell? That’s what being loyal to the cool people does for you, and one of the coolest people around is Lyric. Read about her first encounters with Mitchell here — and watch for more to come. I’ve got them stashed aside for the right time to spring them on you.

I suspect that as this thing grows, as we get closer to getting Trevor’s Song into some form of print, there will be more characters who are friends of the core crew around here. New friends, old friends — friends are where it’s at.

Says the woman who sits behind her computer all day, with only a cat for company…

(did you buy that last line?)

If you want to learn more about any of these characters, use the Cast of Characters tab at the top of the page.

Lately, I’ve taken to posting about authors whose new releases cross my radar. There are plenty of them, of course — and I’m always looking for more. Since my latest update has thirteen authors with new releases (or re-releases), I figured I’d let the band party for another week and remind you of the good stuff that’s already out there. Buying a book in the first 90 days of its release is a great way to support your favorite author (followed only by buying up everything else they’ve published in the past). Here you go: Thirteen Book Blips on Susan’s Radar 1. Anna J. Evans Wicked Witch of the West Village Devil Take Me 2. RG Alexander Who Needs Another Superhero? 3. Carrie Alexander Nobody’s Hero 4. Donica Covey Tides of Maryna’s Love 5. Dakota Cassidy Accidentally Dead 6. Amy Wallen MoonPies and Movie Stars is now out in paper! 7. Christina Dodd Into the Shadow 8. Shelley Munro Price of Love 9. Jennifer Estep Karma Girl has been re-released in the mass-market-size format 10. Elin Hilderbrand A Summer Affair 11. Lorelei James Tied up, Tied Down 12. Stephanie Kuehnert I Wanna Be Your Joey Ramone 13. Vanessa Jaye Felicity Stripped Bare Let me know if you’ve encountered anything great, rave-worthy, or just worth talking about. Yes, feed my small book problem! ** A lack of link in the book title simply means you can’t buy it via Powells. It’s no statement of quality.

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will try to link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

Before we get to the fun, please be sure to stop over at the Midnight Moon Cafe today and wish Tempest a happy birthday!

Now, onto business:

Thirteen ShapeShifter July 4 stories 1. When the band was in their struggling, pre-record deal days, they played a local show at Decade. Ten people showed up. Ten people left around 8:30 to get a good view of the fireworks in Riverview Park. The show started at 8. 2. The year they signed their record deal, ShapeShifter was invited to play the big Riverview Park festivities. Until one of the city councilmen heard their music and went on record as saying, “I don’t care if there’s a Voss in the band. That garbage isn’t polluting my July Fourth.” 3. A year or two after that, the band tried to play a bigger show. Again, no one bought tickets. They got paid their guarantee, but it didn’t feel much like a holiday. 4. Now, the band knows: either be in Europe where the Fourth isn’t a holiday at all and people will come out in droves to see you, or take the week off. 5. Mitchell prefers taking the week off. This is because he’s got a small love affair going with his grill. And what better holiday is there for grilling than the Fourth? 6. I’m sure many of you are expecting to hear how Trevor likes to go wild with the fireworks on the Fourth. Except… he doesn’t. After all, everyone does fireworks on the Fourth and his name is Trevor Wolff, thankyouverymuch. He’s not everybody. 7. Daniel, however, has no such qualms. If they make it, he’s tried it. Usually using Mitchell’s parents’ back yard as his launching pad. 8. He spends a lot of time making nice to the neighbors. It’s not totally necessary, but Sonya and Patterson insist on it. They’re big on doing the right thing, especially after those small fires that Daniel’s experiments started… 9. Mitchell tried using sparklers as lights so he could see the steaks on the grill. It wasn’t one of his better ideas. He got so busy trying to see what he was doing, he burned his fingers. 10. Guitar players plus burned fingers does NOT equal a good idea in anyone’s book. Except maybe for Kerri and Amy’s. But then, when those two get together, whatever happens usually finds Mitchell bearing the brunt of it. 11. Like the flowered apron that Amy managed to not only get over his head, but knotted so well that Mitchell finally took a steak knife to it in order to escape. 12. Of course, when you get four guys in a band together and add beer and a relaxed environment, you get one thing… a jam session. 13. All four guys get to apologize to the neighbors in the morning, including their friend the city councilman. Yeah, the one who didn’t want ShapeShifterly garbage polluting his July Fourth.

Want more? Need some background? Click on the links in the peoples’ names above and you’ll be transported to their bio page at my main website. If you click on the name of the town, you’ll find out why #2 caused some waves…

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will try to link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

I love this week’s Sunday Scribblings prompt. It’s ripe with possibility.

Vision

Do I write about how Scott from Deadly Metal Hatchet wears glasses? Things Chelle observes in her role as a rock and roll reporter for the fictional Trumpet newspaper? What about Roadie Poet? What’s in his vision these days besides a friend named Hambone and a girlfriend he calls More?

I could just post the outtake I have ready to go on Sunday night (so if you’re reading this after Sunday, be sure to check it out). It’s all about a vision Mitchell has. Or I could point you to an archived outtake, like this one. (For anyone familiar with my archives, it’s the Flags outtake.)

But when you get right down to it, this blog and everything on it best represents my vision. My vision of my fictional world, my vision of what it’s like to share it with readers, my vision of what it means to be a writer in 2008. Yes, I’m dying to bring you Trevor’s Song, the novel. No, I can’t even begin to tell you how much richer your reading experience will be because you hang out here with me. Or even stop in and visit from time to time, as many of you do.

I can tell you how much richer my own writing and my own vision for my fiction has become. Because I’ve got this place and because I’ve got readers, I’m constantly pushing myself to dig deeper into this fictional city of Riverview, USA. Not to mention the things I push myself to discover about these characters you read about here. Yes, even the ones you don’t seem to love nearly as much as you love Trevor and Mitchell.

One thing really strikes me in all this: when I began to envision my fake band ShapeShifter (the fake band bit is a reference to my Thursday Thirteen this week and ooh, it hurts to think of these guys as fake. Fictional, sure. Fake? Not so much.), it was Mitchell and Kerri I created first. Trevor has become the proverbial secondary character who insisted on … well, not just his own book, but really running the show.

Yet look at this. Who do you guys relate to the most? Who are your favorites? Trevor, Mitchell, and Roadie Poet (with Chelle running a close second and probably Lyric right there with her, if you knew her better).

They are all men.

I wish I could tell you about the rejection letters I’ve gotten from literary agents who ask me who’d want to read a book about a man. That’s the reason some of them cite for why they don’t want to work with me. They tell me that men don’t read as many books as women, and that Trevor’s Song can’t possibly appeal to women.

Yet Trevor has become the man you can’t help but love. You want more of him and frankly, I don’t blame you. Trevor breaks the rules, and he does so in a manner that irritates a lot of people because he flaunts those rules he’s busy breaking. He blows marijuana smoke in the faces of the school principals while Mitchell hides in a bathroom stall, afraid of what’ll happen once he’s caught and has to face his father. He’s the bad boy with a soft side that everyone but him acknowledges.

I am eager to share my vision with you. I’ve often been vocal about the idea to collect the outtakes I’ve written and self-publish a little volume of them, for no reason other than to let you have some Trevor and Mitchell to hold into your hands. I’m holding off on that for now for reasons I don’t want to get into, but know that it’s something that I just may have to pull a Trevor and do for you. Flaunt the rules, do things my way, on my own terms…

Yeah, that’s part of my vision for myself and for you, my readers. There’s plenty more, of course, so stay tuned for it.

I can’t even begin to thank my friend Winter enough. She volunteered to take my rough idea of the ShapeShifter logo and was able to turn it into something amazing and incredible. Please stop by Winter’s place and rave about what she’s done for me. And if you have ideas of a special pressie as a way of saying thanks, I’m all ears.

One question before I spend the day staring in rapture at it (again): Do you think it’ll help my chances of being listed here? I mean, is that site tailor-made for me, or WHAT? You know I aspire to be there.

Thirteen Things for my Groupies 1. I’ve added a new download to the Free Downloads page of my website. 2. The new one is called Meeting Trevor. 3. You might have read it here, in a slightly different version. From the size of the comment trail, it looks like a lot of you have missed it. 4. I took some time and cleaned it up and edited it before letting it be a download. 5. That’s because what goes on the blog is usually a first draft, or close enough to it to be called a first draft. 6. Part of the idea here is that the downloads will be easier to find, even though you can click on any character on their page at the website and find a list of blog posts that involves them. 7. Another bonus of the outtakes is that they will be in chronological order, which is something that currently doesn’t exist anywhere. Some of you have asked for this. I’m happy to provide. 8. We’ll try to remember to put a little “NEW” icon by the newest outtake when we post them. 9. For now, they’ll all be set in the years before my novel, Trevor’s Song, takes place. You’ll get a unique look at the backstory that creates the book. 10. If Trevor’s Song isn’t published by the time I go through all my outtakes, I’ll figure something out. Self-publish or write more outtakes are the two most obvious solutions! 11. A bonus to doing this is that if there’s enough demand, I can collect the downloads into an actual book that you can buy and put on your shelves and give to friends. That’s going to be entirely dependent on demand, however. 12. One thing that jazzes me is that when people ask if they can buy my book, I can say no, but they can read for free on my website. 13. Tell all your friends. Let’s make them fall as deeply in love with Trevor and company as you are. If you don’t have a Groupie banner but want one, let me know!

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

Thirteen snappy comebacks (read on) Leah Braemel had this story to tell, and it’s so perfect, I had to share it. In case you’re too lazy to click the link (shame on you!), in a nutshell, the story goes like this: two guys shopping early morning in a guitar store. No one’s around except this long-haired heathen, playing a guitar hooked up to a monstrous amp. An amp that’s been turned to 11, at least. Maybe 14. In a guitar shop, not a concert hall. For about half an hour, the shoppers do their best to shop, but Mr. Heathen-on-Guitar won’t let up. He’s got a full-on jam going. But then, when he stops, one of Leah’s guys yells, “Hey! Shut the fuck up!” Oops. Turns out that Mr. Heathen-on-Guitar is a Mega Big Rock Star. You Ozzy fans might have heard of him and no, I’m not talking about Randy Rhoads. Think more current. Think who’s playing with him currently. Now, we have no way of knowing what the real Mr. Heathen-on-Guitar said or did, or if this is a story he even retells — if he’s cool, he does, complete with a chuckle at the chowderheads who didn’t recognize him and a second chuckle at himself for not convincing the guys to buy the new guitar he was there to promote. And since I’ve already taken great liberties with the retelling of this story, I think I’ll take a few more. What if Mr. Heathen-on-Guitar (isn’t that a fine British name, sort of like Stratford-on-Avon?) had been ShapeShifter’s Mitchell Voss? Or ShapeShifter’s lead guitarist, Eric Wallace? Or even our favorite bad boy, Trevor Wolff (who’d never do this sort of thing because it involves playing in public without Mitchell covering his sorry musicianship, but he’d open his mouth and defend his best friend — in typical Trevor style.), and don’t forget our drummer, Daniel Sydor, too. Here’s what they might have said: 1. Eric: Hey, come check out my new guitar. I’ll let you play it. 2. Eric: Oops. Sorry I’m so loud. Here, have some guitar picks. 3. Eric: Got anything you want me to autograph? 4. Mitchell: No. 5. Trevor: If you don’t like the sound of a guitar, go home. 6. Trevor: Who the fuck died and made you the music police? 7. Mitchell: Why? 8. Daniel: Hey, I’m just the drummer. Don’t look at me. 9. Trevor: I can tell them to make it louder. 10. Mitchell: Next you’ll ask me to play fucking Freebird. 11. Trevor: Are you some Bettina Beverly* fan? 12. Mitchell: What? I can’t hear you! 13. Trevor: We were here first. First come, first served doesn’t only apply to me and my girls, you know. * Bettina Beverly? Think Celine Dion, only Riverview style. And now that you’ve had fun with me and the band, go thank Leah for inspiring me so nicely this week, okay? I know she’d appreciate meeting you.

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will try to link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

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By now, the devoted groupies of you should have caught on to the fun I’ve been having with certain writing prompts. Like this week’s Sunday Scribblings.

The prompt this week, for those of you who didn’t go visit it, is called “My nights.” My nights anymore are boring. The Tour Manager puts the kids to bed and I dive for this here computer and begin trying to catch up on everything I didn’t accomplish during the day: blogs, outtakes, and the current novel-length Work in Progress.

Yeah. Like I said, boring.

But, you lucky people you, I write about people who come alive at night. No, not vampires (although some would call KISS such).

I write about a rock band (well, two of them now that I’ve got Deadly Metal Hatchet) and the people who orbit them. That gives me lots of opportunities to write about the night.

I mean, when you’re as big a band as ShapeShifter, you play at night. Even when you’re participating in those day-long (or multi-day-long) concerts. You get to close the show. Like ShapeShifter did that one New Year’s Eve. Or this night.

A good way to spend a night off is to go check out a new band.

The night doesn’t end when a band leaves the stage. Oh, no. First, the band’s gotta have a post-show meal. Or a party.

Sometimes, when a band is in its early days, roadies are hard to afford. That means the band has to do their own load-out after the show. This isn’t always such a bad thing. After all, they might meet interesting people. Or field interesting propositions.

Nights are also good for dreams and serenades. Interesting things bubble out of your subconscious at night. And it’s easy to be romantic at night.

Yeah, I’d rather spend my nights writing about the fictional rock band ShapeShifter and the people who orbit them. The possibilities of what can happen are endless, and I have yet to get tired of exploring, creating, and dreaming. Not to mention writing it all down and sharing it with you here.

Have fun exploring all these links to old posts. If you’re not already a proud West of Mars groupie, hopefully I’ll turn you into one. If you are already a groupie, stay tuned. New stuff is on the way.

The most excellent Alice Audrey awarded me the I Love You This Much award — for Roadie Poet! He’s got a groupie! (and yes, Trevor’s jealous. After all, RP is crew. Trevor’s band. We all know how much cooler it is to be band.)

I’m touched and flattered. And encouraged; I’ve been in a funk lately. I’m expecting a discussion about the Trevor man and it’s been two months and I’m still waiting and going nuts as I wait. I hate to wait, but the reality is that sometimes, the best things in life are the ones that are the hardest to get. And I’m putting the time to best advantage — I hope — by working on another full-length work that I know you guys will dig, and then some.

At the same time, I’m MONTHS overdue in acknowledging this one:
… E is for Excellent!

Gwen, She Writes Poetry, and Marcia all think I’m pretty excellent.

I think you guys are, too.

SO. Ready for Thirteen things?

Thirteen Awards we all dream of winning. C’mon. Admit it. You do. 1. The Stanley Cup. Okay, so it’s on my mind. Go figure. Sue me. Whatever; just help root the Penguins on to an improbable victory. And no, their winning isn’t the same as MY winning. *I* want to win it and hold it and hoist it over my head… Did you know I am a certified coach and that I used to play ice hockey? It was the last Stanley Cup craze in Pittsburgh that encouraged me to learn all that. 2. An Oscar. What can I say? Maybe I’m shallow, but I’d love to walk the red carpet and watch my band win. Yes, for a movie version of Trevor. Or something else I’ve created. I’m not terribly picky. 3. An Emmy. ShapeShifter hits your TV. Could be fun. 4. A Grammy. For writing the music behind ShapeShifter. Nevermind that I’m about as musical as a door, I’ve got a really good ear for what’s hot and what’ll be popular. Or so I learned during my years as a college radio DJ. 5. A Tony Award. Yep, for writing a musical. 6. The Nobel Prize. Not because I want to write heavy literature that changes the world (quite the contrary; I want to entertain the world), but because it’s awarded for an entire body of work, and to win it, you have to get an entire body of work published. No small feat in today’s day and age. 7. Best new writer. From anyone. From everyone. ‘Cause, you know, it’ll mean there’s a book in your hands. 8. Community service awards. I have plans in mind. My good friend Bridget and I will be working on them over the summer. Stay tuned. 9. Induction into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Hey, why not? If there are songwriters in there (Lieber and Stoller come immediately to mind), there can be novelists, too. (What? You don’t know who Lieber and Stoller are? Google them as you sing “Hound Dog,” okay?) 10. How about an MTV Music Award? Or an American Music Award? Yeah, so what if they don’t mean what they meant back in the late eighties, I still dreamed of winning them for something I’d written. Like that makes sense, I know. Music awards for writing. But this is me. I like breaking rules. 11. Maybe I’ll start a new award. The Trevor Award. I’ll be the first person to get it, and I’ll give it to people who are rebels like me and Trev… hmmm…. that’s not a bad idea… 12. Every blog award that’s out there. Not because I’m greedy so much as because it’s how I know you guys love what I do. 13. A published novel that you can buy in any bookstore and that gets reviewed in all sorts of great places. To nothing but praise, of course. What other reward could there be in life beyond the gratification of sharing your vision with the world? All that comes before in this list pales next to that.

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will try to link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
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Well, come ON. I’ve been a Penguin season ticket holder since before I had kids (and sat through a multiple overtime game while six months pregnant, too — although we didn’t stay until the end). How can I NOT gush about my Penguins this morning? I need to give props to the Red Wings, too. It wouldn’t have been the amazing game it was if they hadn’t played so bloody well.

Oops. Sorry. I know, that was Ryan Malone playing with bloody cotton sticking out of his freshly (in the second period) re-broken nose. His nose will look like Trevor’s before too long if he keeps this up…

While we’re talking hockey, my thoughts turn to Nova Scotia, where Sidney Crosby’s from. And so is the winner of my excerpt collection. Yes, Julia, you pulled it out, too. I’ll contact you for your address and get these out to you. I know you’ll like them.

I’m going to leave you with that for now. I’m beat after last night, which makes me wonder how the players feel this morning…

Thirteen Things ShapeShifter does on tour One more week of school in the West of Mars school district. My thoughts have turned to summer (even though it’s so cold I’m wearing a warm-up jacket. Hello? May? Where are you?). Last year around this time, I took a look at what the band does while on tour. This year, they’re taking a break from the extensive tour and appreciating the season. You can probably figure out who does what by now, but if not, it’s still a good list. I’ll be doing some of these, myself. 1. Playing or hanging at day-long music festivals. 2. Hanging in the hammock out back and playing guitar. 3. Sleeping late. 4. Back porches after sundown with a cold beer. And a cigarette. 5. Hanging at Daniel’s pool. Yes, Mabel the Fifteenth tried to go swimming. Why do you ask? 6. Fighting over who gets to do the honors in front of the grill. 7. Going to Big Buck’s and sitting outside on the patio, where it’s cooler and there’s always a breeze off the river. 8. Girls in scanty clothing. Or, better yet, bikinis. 9. Wearing nothing but cut-off shorts, yourself. 10. Laying in that hammock without a guitar and dreaming. 11. The steamy heat of a club, whether you’re playing or hanging. 12. Blasting your own music out your car windows as you tool around town, feeling cooler than you probably are. 13. Val’s lemonade. Nothing better on a hot day.

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will try to link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
View More Thursday Thirteen Participants