Thirteen Reasons why Daniel‘s a Drummer 1. His grandmother bought him a drum set to make him feel better about the divorce and having to live with her. 2. The pots and pans called to him, but not to cook. 3. Val thinks it’s the sexiest instrument there is. 4. His sense of rhythm is impeccable. 5. He likes to beat on things. 6. Drumming beats fidgeting, which he does anyway when not playing. 7. You look cool when you casually twirl a stick through your fingers. 8. You look even cooler when you learn how to bounce a stick off the sidewalk and catch it without missing a step. 9. Sticks thrown into the crowd go further than guitar picks. 10. Drumming can be loud as hell or soft as a whisper 11. The variety of sticks, drums, and cymbals is just darn cool. 12. Girls throw themselves at you because they want to experience your rhythm. 13. All sorts of bands need good drummers. From marching bands and orchestras at school to jazz bands and oldies bands and the ultimate prize: rock bands. Drummers are always in demand.

Yeah, it’s been one of those busy weeks over here, so nothing too terribly exciting today. Be sure to check back during the rest of the week for more fun!

I love seeing all you guys stop in on Thursdays to visit. I do. Ask my family; they’ll tell you. But… some of you only stop in on Thursdays. Why is that? Don’t you know what fun you’re missing? Many of the links will show you, but if you’re still not convinced, here’s proof:

Thirteen Reasons to stop in during the week 1. Roadie Poet. He only appears for Rhian‘s Poetry Train. 2. Outtakes. If you think Thirteens are fun, you should see what happens when we throw some narration into the mix! 3. Awards. I get lots of them. I pass lots of them along. 4. Susan returns all visits. If you’re a regular, she may not comment each time you’re here. But if you’re not, dropping by to say hi is a good way to get a return visit. And we all know how stat counters like return visits! 5. Chelle LaFleur. She’ll appear whenever she’s got something to say; not even I know when that’ll be. 6. You get to meet groupies who are more die-hard than you are. Come on. Are you really going to let someone tell you they’re more die-hard than you are??? 7. Trevor and more Trevor. (the second link will take you to one of Trevor’s first appearances on the blog) 8. Guest appearances by the Tour Manager. 9. You won’t feel lost during events like Green Hair Week, the Soy Sauce Story, or Deadly Metal Hatchet because the back story happened during the week. 10. You’ll get to know all these crazy folk who inhabit my fictional world. Before you know it, you’ll be hooked and sporting a cool “I’m a West of Mars Groupie” graphic of your own. 11. I know neat people. Hang here and you can meet them, too. 12. Because of the inspiration you guys give me, my fictional world keeps growing. You want to be part of that. You know you do. 13. Did I mention that Trevor Wolff dude?

My friends Red and Thomma Lyn both handed me the Blogging Star Award recently. Here’s a picture; ain’t it purty?

The Blogging Star Award was created by Barb at Skittles’ Place. Of the Blogging Star Award, Barb says:

This award is for bloggers who shine their light throughout the Blogosphere. Some do it with humor, others with creativity, and others with their kind and thoughtful natures. We all know more than a few of them so why not give them some recognition?

Here’s what to do if you receive this:

* Proudly display it on your blog along with a link to who gave it to you.
* Mention that it originated here at Skittles’ Place so I can follow its journey.
* Pass it on to any blogger(s) you think should have it.

Well. Let’s see. Who makes me all warm and fuzzy when I see them in my reader? Well… Rhian is the obvious choice ’cause she’s been the … oh, I can’t say butt so maybe the willing victim of a Trevor prank is putting it a bit better. But Rhian’s more rebellious than I am, and she tends to follow directions worse than I do.

Maybe Lisa. You can call her the Nekkid Man woman ’cause that’s what her Thursday Thirteens are all about. And have you seen some of the wild things she digs up to share? Truly cool.

And definitely PJ at The Urban Recluse. She’s handed me plenty of awards, and has definitely earned this one. I miss Sunday Sauce, though!

Don’t forget Robin, the inspiration behind the ShapeShifter fan fiction that’s been cropping up around the blogosphere. She’s been on a total tear lately, writing really beautiful essays, each one better than the last.

So there you go. Some pretty darn deserving ladies, and not easy choices among all you guys. I don’t know how I’ve managed to do it, except to say that like attracts like, and I’m damn proud to know (and read) all of you.

I’d also like to end this post by saying I’d drafted it a good two weeks ago and am just now having the proper time to post it so it gets noticed and its proper due. If any of you can please cancel the soap opera I’m currently starring in, I’d much appreciate it!

Tonight marks the beginning of Yom Kippur, one of the holiest days in the Jewish calendar. When I was little, I was taught that it was the holiest, but my current rabbi insists that the holiest is the weekly Shabbat. I suspect he’s right.

Tonight, Jews around the world will get up from dinner and begin a 24-hour fast (okay, most will) that will help set the day apart. It is a day filled with prayer and reflection, a day for thinking on our lives, what we did wrong, what we can do better. It is serious and somber, which is so different from the many joyous celebrations that Judaism is filled with — although it sounds as if it’s not nearly so somber in Israel.

It is said that at the end of Yom Kippur, when the ram’s horn shofar blows one final time, the Gates of Repentance will close. These metaphoric gates opened on Rosh Hashanah ten days earlier; this signalled the beginning of the period of reflection and, you guessed it, repentance.

However, Yom Kippur has come to have a different meaning for me. I was pregnant with #2 when my book club read Lilian Nattel’s brilliant The River Midnight, a book about a small village — shetl — in Poland. The story centered on the midwife; the life centered around the temple.

Thus, when the midwife went into labor as Yom Kippur began, the townspeople left the temple. Instead of listening to the sacred Kol Nidre song, they listened to the midwife’s cries of pain.

This doesn’t sound like something that should resonate with a person. Yet the scene as Nattel wrote it was absolutely stunning; it drove home the beauty of the shetl and the importance of community. It haunted me, who’s always been more than a bit of a loner.

Plus, as I said, I was pregnant when I read the book. Upon finishing it, I looked at a calendar. My due date was only a few days after Yom Kippur. What were the chances…? I mean, really?

The evening of Yom Kippur, when the Kol Nidre prayer is sung, came and went.

The next afternoon, when I picked up my son from day care, I realized that yep, the daily Braxton-Hicks contractions were back. Same time, every day; the Tour Manager and I had been laughing at how very regular they were. These were stronger, though. And when I got home and put my son down for a nap, I listened to that little voice inside. The one that knows these things.

I called the Tour Manager at work, just to be safe.

Just before five o’clock on that Yom Kippur afternoon, I called my parents. They were on their way out the door to attend the concluding services when they heard the phone ring. Knowing I was due in days, they answered.

My daughter was born at ten o’clock that night, well after the Gates of Repentance were closed.

Yet I still equate the holiday with my little girl. I probably always will; she is, in her own way, my own Yom Kippur baby.

One day, I’ll hand her my copy of The River Midnight and see if the connection strikes her as deeply as it struck me. But until then, as everyone in temple around me prays for forgiveness and redemption, I’ll be remembering the joy of a new beginning.

A note for those of you who noticed: I called the Kol Nidre both a prayer and a song. In kabbalistic beliefs, the Hebrew words for prayer and song have the same numeric value. Thus, prayer equals song, a belief I personally think is totally underutilized. Thankfully, my rabbi agrees and we are a congregation that sings. A lot.

We all know who runs the show around here: Trevor, Mitchell, Kerri, Daniel, and Eric (and sometimes Val). But like any success story, there’s a backstage supporting cast. Sometimes, you’ll see them. Other times, you won’t. Likewise, some of these people have earned spots on the Cast of Characters page at my website. And others of them haven’t. Yet.

For those of you who are new and those who’ve been here awhile and could use a refresher, I present you with:

Thirteen People Who Hang out in the Wings (picture by Jeff Myers via Roadie.net) 1. Amy London — Mitchell’s older sister, who calls him Pipsqueak and actually gets away with it. She is a doctor, lives in Riverview, and is married to a man Mitchell not-so-affectionately calls Derek the Dork. Note from Susan: the Pipsqueak link takes you to the end of a five-day arc. If you have the time, it’s worth starting at the beginning. 2. Graciella — The drag queen who saves Kerri from the evil clutches of the guy with the guitar in the train station. She becomes Kerri’s mentor, protector, and good friend. There is, of course, a kicker here: Graciella’s given name is George and she’s a he who looks and feels better in a dress. 3. Pam — A groupie who you’ll see here on the blog occasionally. She’s in love with Mitchell and basically uses Trevor to get to him. As if any of them care — well, Mitchell does once he meets Kerri. Note from Susan: Stay tuned. I haven’t posted that most important outtake yet!! I could have sworn I had! 4. Lyric — Another of my characters who shows up here on occasion. Lyric owns the adult toy store in town but isn’t the wild woman you’d expect from the daughter of a porn star. 5. Sonya and Patterson Voss — Mitchell’s parents. They also show up here from time to time. They are the rudders who keep the ShapeShifter ship afloat. 6. Boomer — the 6 to 10 DJ at KRVR, as well as the host of the station’s Local View radio station, which features up-and-coming Riverview bands, all of whom want to be the next ShapeShifter. 7. Deadly Metal Hatchet — A bar band with a gimmick to die for. Literally. 8. Bobby, Cookie, Creek, and Chuck — the techs for Mitchell, Trevor, Daniel, and Eric, respectively. These are the men who are responsible for making sure the individuals in the band always sound good, are always in tune, and always have the right guitars or intact drum heads. Being a tech’s not glamorous work, but it’s steady employment — when the band is active. 9. Roberta — the band’s wardrobe manager. Wardrobe managers are more important than you might think. 10. Tony, Gene, and Bubba, Butch, or whatever his name is — Part of the band’s security team. Tony is the head of the detail, and Mitchell’s personal bodyguard. Gene takes charge of Kerri’s safety, and provides general security for the band when she’s not around or not in need of him. And Bubba, Butch, or whatever his name is does his best to keep a watchful eye on Trevor. 11. Hank — Trevor’s father. 12. Mary — Kerri’s mother. As with Hank, the less said, the better. 13. Tiny Tim — the owner of independent radio station KRVR. He’s a player in Riverview, and he and Mitchell hate each other.

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
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Check out what Dewey‘s up to now: A 24-hour readathon, in which the most die-hard readers will forgo basic things like showering.

Now, if you were all going to spend 24 hours reading my fiction, I’d … well, still think you’re nuts. That’s because my pillow and I are very good friends. It prefers me to be using it for sleep, not to prop up my persnickety back. And to be honest, nothing beats a good, restorative sleep. Except for maybe those really good dreams that you remember come morning. Or those hours of insomnia that are spent working out new scenes, characters, and/or outtakes.

The good news is that there’s room for the not-so-dedicated readers, too. And for cheerleaders. And for people like me, who can’t possibly have this much time on their hands to simply sit and read (but what a luxury that sounds like!). This challenge is completely customizable, so … join the fun and read away!

(before you ask, I’ll gladly lurk and leave comments on readers’ blogs — a few hours late, I’m sure. But hey, admit it. You’d rather see Trevor’s Song on the shelves than me spending an entire day reading.)

I’m stealing a page from Sparky Duck and running with some song lyrics today. Nope, not ShapeShifter lyrics (sorry, guys. But if you have lyric ideas, send ’em my way!), but a popular song I’ve been jamming to. Might even download and hand out to my spin teachers and stick on my MP3 player. Plus, it’s fitting right now; I’ve finished the first draft of the new end of Trevor’s Song.

Anyway, here you go.

Life is Beautiful:

You can’t quit until you try
You can’t live until you die
You can’t learn to tell the truth
Until you learn to lie

You can’t breathe until you choke
You gotta laugh when you’re the joke
There’s nothing like a funeral to make you feel alive

Just open your eyes
Just open your eyes
And see that life is beautiful.
Will you swear on your life,
That no one will cry at my funeral?

I know some things that you don’t
I’ve done things that you won’t
There’s nothing like a trail of blood to find your way back home

I was waiting for my hearse
What came next was so much worse
It took a funeral to make me feel alive

Just open your eyes
Just open your eyes
And see that life is beautiful.
Will you swear on your life,
That no one will cry at my funeral?

Just open your eyes
Just open your eyes
And see that life is beautiful.
Will you swear on your life,
That no one will cry at my funeral?

Just open your eyes
Just open your eyes
And see that life is beautiful.
Will you swear on your life,
That no one will cry at my funeral?

Just open your eyes
Just open your eyes
And see that life is beautiful.
Will you swear on your life,
That no one will cry at my funeral?

Check out the way cool band site at Sixx:AM! And for more poetry and other fun things, Rhian’s Poetry Train‘s got room for you to ogle or jump on. Whichever your comfort level, come explore some really creative people.

Also, Sixx’s new book The Heroin Diaries will be published on Tuesday. Man, I can NOT wait to get my hands on that puppy. Think I can con someone into a free copy so I can review it for Front Street Reviews?

Life is Beautiful lyrics copyright 2007 by Sixx:AM. Used entirely without permission and hopefully without negative repercussions ’cause, hey, I’m not profiting here, just helping spread the word. Contact the webmaster at https://westofmars.com if you want to get all picky on my rear, and the Tour Manager will deal with it. I love the Tour Manager!

My bud Lisa Andel tagged me for the Five Nights Meme. She thinks I always have something interesting to say.

I don’t, but the boys in the band do. They seem a bit somber today, though, so this ought to live up to Lisa’s expectations.

Mitchell:
1. It was that first night I spent with Kerri. No, not the night I had her and Daniel and Eric over for burgers and she and I got so drunk, she spent the night in my bed and I passed out or something on the couch. And no, not the night two weeks later when we planned to have her crash at my place after the Regional Awards and she was my date. She was supposed to have the bed to herself, but she caught the Chill and when she was still cold after I put every blanket in my place on her and then threw my leather tour jacket on top of all that, there was only one way to warm her up: making her cuddle up to me. You’ll notice she hasn’t left me since.

But nope, those weren’t the two best nights with Kerri. The best was that night we hooked up at the grocery and talked our way through the store and then went to Victory’s and talked until we closed the place. Just sitting and talking to a girl. I’d never done that before.

2. Our first show. We’d worked our asses off to make sure we didn’t suck. And we didn’t. We rocked, as much as a brand-new band can rock. You’ve got to start somewhere.

Trevor:
3. I was sitting in jail and the cops are screaming at me about first-degree murder and all that shit and the next thing I know, Patterson‘s there and he’s saying no one got shot, let alone is dead and he’s got legal custody of me and there’s no reason to keep me in jail. That’s when I went to live with the Vosses. I didn’t find out what legal custody meant until I quit school, but somehow, Patterson got Hank and Jenny to write me off as their kid. I guess it should have hurt, but Patterson told me that if the band made it, they’d never have a legal way to come try to get their hands on any money I made.

Daniel:
4. Our first night as a headlining act. Holy shit, there was so much space between me and the guys, and it was actually hard to see even the front row of fans. I’d gotten so used to that smooshed little stage that as soon as I was put at the back of the full stage, like every other headlining drummer, I freaked. I missed being near everyone. I hated that Mitchell and I couldn’t talk as easily during the show.

Clearly, I sucked it up fast, but when we sit down to plan every tour, I ask Mitchell if we can find a way to move me up closer. He won’t even consider it.

Don’t let anyone tell you that Mitchell’s not a traditionalist.

Kerri:
5. It was the night Mom caught me with Vince. What’s the saying? In flagrant delecteco?

I don’t think I’ve ever been as mad as I was that night. But as soon as she put her hand on my arm and tried to pull me away from Vince, I knew what I’d be doing. And no matter how mad I was, underneath, there was this really calm, rational thinking going on. When I got back home, I knew exactly what I was going to pack and what I wanted Stevie, my brother, to ship to me once I had a place to live.

Just like that, I left town and moved to Riverview. I never looked back. I never regretted it.

It all started when Trevor brought a new addition to the ShapeShifter Wall of Fame last week. He brought up the idea of showing you public what the Wall looks like. The Wall was originally Mitchell‘s idea, so he thought he should get to show you around. But the tour was Trevor’s idea. While the two of them are busy arguing over who gets to share their stories, Eric‘s going to step up and fill the void. Thus… Thirteen items on the ShapeShifter Wall of Fame: 1. This was the bra that inspired the Wall of Fame. We were backstage, getting ready for our set and some girl walked in the room, took off this bra, and draped it over Mitchell’s head. He blushed. Trevor thanked the girl in his typical way and tried to steal the bra. I think he wanted to wear it. Mitchell grabbed it back and said it was going to go onto a new Wall of Fame. He kept that bra until we got home, and then he hung it on a wall in the practice space at Daniel’s house. Now, we have our Tour Manager ship them home for us. 2. We didn’t come by this one honestly, I’m afraid. We were in Vegas and Daniel dared Trevor to sneak into some showgirl’s dressing room and make off with part of her costume. Trevor can’t turn down a dare of this sort, but he didn’t sneak. He picked a girl who was so gorgeous, my eyes hurt to look at her. When Trevor came back out of the dressing room, he said she gave it to him. Given the look she gave him when she kissed him goodbye, I don’t doubt it. 3. I can’t say anything without upsetting Daniel, but I don’t believe this should be on the Wall of Fame. It’s apparently Val’s. 4. This bra belonged to a girl I dated for about a month. I met her in Seattle at a show and at first, she followed us in her own car. Three weeks later, she convinced a friend to drive the car home so she could stay on the bus with me. She only lasted on the bus with us for a week before she couldn’t take it. We didn’t stay in touch, but it wasn’t for lack of effort on my end. 5, 6, 7. These belonged to this set of triplets who got past security. We were very glad they did. 8. Ever notice how gorgeous a basic white bra looks against darker skin? The contrast is amazing. I’m not talking about a girl with a fake tan that rubs off onto the cotton, either. The next time you see that white bra against a deeply colored skin, stop and appreciate. 9. Those Texas girls… We love them. 10. We’ve known the girl behind this bra for years. She shows up whenever we’re in Minneapolis and the surrounding area, depending on how free her schedule is. Karina loves to travel, so we shouldn’t have been surprised when she caught up with us in Paris. The best thing about Karina: she’s always wearing this bra. Well, not this particular one. But this exact style. We’ve got like twenty of them laying around. Mitchell keeps asking us what would happen if we gave the other nineteen back. Trevor says once we start that game, it’ll never end. We’ll wind up passing the same bra back and forth between us. He’s probably right. 11. I always thought there was something virginal about this bra (and notice how the white stands out against that gorgeous skin of hers). And then I met the woman inside it. I was right. 12. Trevor has a thing for demi-bras, especially when the girls are overflowing them slightly. You want to see that boy drool? Show up in one of these. I picked this one as an example because I really like the color. 13. Trevor brought us this one just last week. Something about it being left behind when he was hanging with some cool folk who tell stories in 100 words or less and the owner maybe asking Susan for it back, but we were all supposed to play dumb and … oh, shoot. Susan’s going to read this, isn’t she? Umm. Well, then. Let me tell you the real story behind it. It’s been here for years and we have no idea who Rhian is. Really.

And a HUGE L’shanah Tova to my fellow Jewish friends. May we all be inscribed for a wonderful new year, Jew and non-Jew alike. May our blogs continue to be places where our differences are celebrated and our likenesses treasured.

My friend Lisa writes a lot about alpha males. And my friend Robin wrote a quickie for Ellora’s Cave about a very dominant man. So much so that when his woman would make a comment he didn’t like, he’d snap into their games and bring her behavior into line.

For a few weeks after I read and loved Robin’s quickie, I kept thinking about the way her male lead dominates the narrator. It’s constant. It bothers me; in my brain, it borders on abuse. It’s so foreign to anything I’ve ever experienced.

Or so I thought.

I’m a mom; most of you know that. While I refuse to be one of those moms who runs her kids from activity to activity with nary a second of free play, the kids do have their things. One of them is the place in which I met Alpha.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I refuse to say a single bad thing about Alpha. I like Alpha, and I was looking forward to getting to know him. On the surface, he’s a quiet, reserved guy, but underneath, he’s got his mischevious streak — evidenced on the day he nailed the Tour Manager with a water balloon — yeah. There. I’m not sure which of the two of us laughed harder, me or Alpha. Definitely not my poor Tour Manager.

Many of you know that I took five days at the end of July and headed off to Cub Scout Camp. It rained four of the five nights, including one really evil thunderstorm that had some of the pack parents convinced that lightning had struck the flagpole outside their tents. It was a hell of an experience for me and my son; we both came back changed.

I knew that camp had had a profound impact on me when Alpha made a rule for the upcoming year’s activities. Some of the parents protested this new rule because it would exclude them from activities, and that upset me. I’d gotten to know these particular parents over the past year. I like them. My son likes their kids. There’s no reason to exclude anyone, especially from a group that you join to be included in.

I might not have spoken up before camp; this rule didn’t affect me in the least. I was quite happy to live by it. Except that it meant that people I like couldn’t be there, and that bugged me.

Well, this is where I underestimated how alpha this man is. Not only did he get upset that we discussed the issue over e-mail instead of calling him, after a few days worth of phone calls and e-mails among his higher-ups, him, us, and the affected families, the dust settled. We “troublemakers” were thrown out of the group and would be founding a parallel one.

Which is fine; I’m looking forward to that. What hurt was when Alpha told the Tour Manager, who has a rare skill for diplomacy in the sticky situations his wife drags him into, even willingly, that Alpha wished we hadn’t spoken up in support of changing this rule. He liked us, loves our kid, sees a lot of potential in my child but because we’d spoken up in support of our fellow families, we were excommunicated. Just for speaking up.

It reminds me of something you’d see on Wild Kingdom. Except we weren’t trying to challenge Alpha’s leadership. We weren’t trying to change the way the group is run. We just wanted to see others have the same chances we were going to have. After all, why be part of something if you’re going to turn around and realize you’re not welcome there?

There is a part of Judaism that calls on us Jews to perform acts of Tikkun Olam — to heal the world. The Tour Manager and I stood up for what we believed was an injustice. We agonized for days over what to do about this situation; what was best for our son?

In the end, with the declaration of the parallel group, it seems to have worked out. That doesn’t mean that from start to finish, people weren’t hurt. Meeting the families involved in the original group will be awkward at best. I wouldn’t be surprised if some encounters are hostile.

Yet I wonder. Did we do more harm than good by speaking up? I suppose that it’s better that this happened now, rather than later, when we were more emotionally involved with the group and Alpha as our leader. And there’s that quote by Dr. Martin Luther King about why we need to stand up when we see an injustice — and this was clearly that.

But still. How can the world heal when the attempt to do so brings so much pain for so many involved? Didn’t we make things worse in our attempt to make them better? And how do you judge that sort of thing, anyway?

I wrestled with this until last night. We took the kids to Temple for Friday night services. And as I was flipping through the prayerbook as we sang — and sang! Oh, it was wonderful — my eye caught one of those little boxes with a meditation inside. I was going to borrow the prayer book so I could repeat it here, but it said something to the effect of: In order to make something new, you have to tear down the old and sew the pieces into something new. That pain is part of the process.

I suspect I’ll always be sad about the way things unfolded. I don’t like ugly endings, and this is probably one of them. But on the other hand, I got a look into what the Tour Manager calls a true Alpha male, someone who will not be challenged by anyone. Ever.

Maybe one day, an Alpha of this type will show up in my fiction. Or maybe, this is just one of those things that I’ll simply chalk up to experience and count it among my acts of Tikkun Olam.

Originally, Trevor’s Song was supposed to be the follow-up book to the story of Mitchell, Kerri, and Kerri’s mother. It was supposed to tell the story of ShapeShifter’s dead bass player. The hows, the whys … all that fun stuff.

But then I woke up one day and realized that Trevor’s Song is really the better story. That I’m still floundering with the story of Kerri’s mother; it’s not right. Yet. So shopping commenced and by last May — yeah, a few short months ago — I realized that the problem I’m having with selling Trevor’s Song isn’t the writing or the story or anything of the sort. It’s that it’s hard to sell a book about a rock star. It’s hard to sell a book about a dude with cancer.

Put them together and it ain’t like what you get when chocolate and peanut butter taste great together.

At about this time, some of you devoted groupies started to really fall hard for Trevor Wolff. You guys love the man.

And I began to feel guilty. Because, after all, I know how the book ends. It ain’t pretty. And you guys won’t like it. The more Rhian fights the whole world for her shot at Trevor, the worse I’ve been feeling.

Thunder and lightning have been themes for me this summer, and today, lightning struck in the form of Lisa Andel, who is probably floored by the ease with which I took what was a very bold, critical statement and found paydirt. All those years of writers’ workshops in undergrad and MFA programs do pay off in the long run, boys and girls. They teach you how to stare down an ugly truth and turn it into something beautiful.

So… the post I had edited for later today will have to wait a few while you digest this news and try to figure out what I’m up to. Booking Through Thursday, which I was going to have a lot of fun with this week, will have to wait for another day and another topic.

Right now, I’ve got a book to revise. And an ending that’ll make Rhian just that much happier.

Maybe.

I mean, there’s still this girl named Heather for her to consider…

Over the past few weeks, we’ve talked quite a bit about groupies. We started with stereotypes, moved on to the truth, and then spent last week celebrating ShapeShifter and you guys who’ve become my groupies (or are about to).

This week, to end the unit of study, I thought I’d bring you the notes of famed journalist Kermit Ladd, who continues to try to sit down and control an interview with the members of ShapeShifter. Being a smart sort, Kermit sat down with frontman/rhythm guitarist Mitchell Voss, but before long, the party was crashed, and this is what ensued:

Thirteen Things about Groupies Thirteen things about Groupies 1. Mitchell: The thing about groupies, what makes them so good, is that they love us. Trevor: It’s all about the love. Mitchell: No, no. Really. These women love us. To the point that they’d marry us if they could. Trevor (sniffs): Like I’m getting married? Ever? 2. Mitchell: Hold on a second. You see, when someone loves you, all they want to do is please you. Trevor: And please us they do. (He folds his arms over his chest and nods once. Firmly.) 3. Mitchell: For them, it’s all about giving pleasure. All we need to do is sit back and take it. 4. Trevor: You greedy, lying bastard. You get off on showering these girls with attention just as much as I do. Watching them start to drool ’cause you’re looking at them and then they hold their breaths, hoping you’re about to give ’em that invite they want so bad… (He takes a deep breath through his nose, his eyes closed in satisfaction.) Yeah, that’s the best. 5. Mitchell: Here’s the thing with groupies. We do make fun of them when they can’t hear, but you’re not a real band until you’ve got ’em. We know that. We love them for it. Trevor: We make fun of them when they’re not around? (Mitchell cuffs the back of Trevor’s head.) 6. Mitchell: They’re important people in the world of a band. The smart (he gives Trevor a sidelong glance) guys know this. The groupies who are cool or extra-special, if you know what I mean, those are the girls we’ll tell the crew to keep an eye out for. Trevor: Sort of like that Lana chick. The whole crew knows Lana. They watch out for her. Help her past venue security, give her passes without the usual payment, make sure she gets fed. Mitchell: I heard Cookie once slipped food out of the crew’s catering for her. Trevor: Wouldn’t surprise me. Cookie knows who he works for. Mitchell: The band? Trevor: Me, you dumbfuck. 7. Mitchell: These groupies, the devoted ones, they’ll say they work for us. That they’re as essential to us as people like Cookie are. Trevor: They’re wrong. They’re in it for themselves. To get close to us. Cookie’s around to be my bass tech. Mitchell: Might want to tell him that. I know he likes your rejects. 8. Trevor: How’d we get on to this? We started off saying that these girls are all about pleasing us. Mitchell: They are. Trevor: But now you’re saying they’re all about getting close to us. Mitchell: Nope. You said that. Not me. Trevor: Same fucking thing. (Mitchell gives him a confused look) 9. Trevor: Are we done with the groupies yet? I’m bored. Mitchell: Nope. We have four more points to make. Trevor: Why not get Adam and his camera in here and let him do a picture thing? Mitchell: Because this guy’s here to talk to us. Talk, Trev. Not look at pictures. Trevor: Pictures are more interesting. I’m done talking. (Trevor wanders off) 10. Mitchell: So I guess we’re back to just me, huh? Shit. Maybe Trevor’s right and we have said it all. 11. Mitchell: Nope, never taken pictures of the girls I’ve been with just so I can remember them later. That’s probably a good thing. Now that I’m married, I’d have to burn them all. 12. Mitchell: Nope, not going to write some tell-all book and spill it all. What happened back in my single days needs to stay there, and not just because Kerri doesn’t want to hear it. 13. Mitchell: Yes, girls do still grab my dick and slip me some tongue and do everything else they can think of to get me to take them over my wife. Not a single one of them’s gotten anything but an escort out of the room, though. I don’t care how great they are, Kerri’s better. I guess that means my groupie days are done.

Over the last two weeks, I’ve been talking about ShapeShifter groupies. I’ve forgotten one of the most important varieties of groupies, however.

MINE.

The time seems right to proudly unveil my new graphic for you. If you’d like to display it on your own blog or website, I’d be honored. (just … please don’t hotlink!) And yes, at some unidentified point in the future, look for me to start giving away prizes to anyone with the graphic on their blog.

[ The graphic is available in both JPG and GIF formats, with either white or orange text – The Tour Manager ]

And now, on to business:

Thirteen ways to tell you’re a true West of Mars Groupie 1. You check the blog repeatedly throughout the day for updates, even though you get the feed. 2. You call radio stations and ask them to play ShapeShifter’s Still Life or Behold Me. 3. You try to book your vacation to Riverview, USA. 4. You bug Susan for West of Mars and ShapeShifter merchandise, and then you buy lots of it once she coughs it up. 5. You have dreams in which you get to meet Mitchell Voss or Trevor Wolff. 6. You want to go to Riverview Art Academy, like Kerri did. 7. To prove you’re worthy of Riverview Art Academy, you submit art to Susan (who will post any fan art on her website and talk to you about using some for t-shirts if she likes your stuff!) 8. You ask your local guitar shop to outfit you with the same gear that ShapeShifter uses. 9. You spend hours Googling in search of ShapeShifter tabs. 10. You write fan fiction, which Susan gladly posts on her website. 11. You make all your friends stop by ’cause this is something they just can’t miss out on. 12. You e-mail Susan and offer suggestions for outtakes. 13. You e-mail Susan and suggest real things that she ought to check out and incorporate into the fictional world of Riverview USA.

There you go! Do you resemble any of these? I suspect a few (or more) of you do… Your devotion to Trevor and company, along with your unflagging support have been a source of determination and strength whenever I get down about not having a book to give you yet. Keep on making this noise and I’ll either give in and self-publish or we’ll find a brave agent and publisher yet. Either way, it’ll get a book in your hands, and that’s what our ultimate goal is.

Once again, thanks to all you groupies. You guys rock.

I might be getting immune to these honors, guys!

Jenny McB, who is fast becoming one of my most recent groupies, has awarded me with the Nice Matters Award. She said she gave it to me because of my positive comments here and at other blogs. I do try my best to always be positive and upbeat. Misery may love company but smiles make everyone feel good.

Here’s the details about this one:
This award is for those bloggers who are nice people; good blog friends and those who inspire good feelings and inspiration. Also for those who are a positive influence on our blogging world. Once you’ve been awarded please pass it on to 7 others who you feel are deserving of this award.

The next one is the Thoughtful Blogger Award, given to me by one of my groupies and buds, Amy Ruttan. Amy’s one of my favorite blog reads; one of those people I always turn to first when I see her listed in my reader. If you don’t read Amy’s blog, why not???

Now, another Meme, but this one’s cool ’cause some of you have no clue what’s hiding in my archives. I’m aiming to fix that rather permanently, but not just yet. I’ve got some other small details to take care of, first.

Marcia, at MeeAugraphie and Tumbled Words (and whose RSS feed I miss dearly), tagged me with this one.

Here we go…
Link 1 must be about family: One of my all-time favorites. This scene actually existed before the blog. Although I like this one a lot, too. Or… Or…

Link 2 must be about friends: This was a hard one to pick. Friends are important in my fictional world. Friends take the place of family, and family takes the place of friends.

Anyone think I’m trying to make a statement?

Link 3 must be about yourself, who you are, what you’re all about: Umm… Help! This blog isn’t about me! It’s about my fiction!

Link 4 must be about something you love: I’ll explain more later about why this is such an important thing.

Oh, hell, I’ll do it here: people are trying to ban this book because of its liberal use of the F-word (I did it delicately for you, Marcia!). But really. If you’re going to set a book in the world of punk rock, you may as well do it authentically. And KL Going has done just that. Trust me. I used to live in places like she creates. Or so it felt at the time.

Furthermore, does anyone REALLY believe that by the time our kids are old enough to form bands and hang out in clubs, they haven’t heard words like fuck?

Fat Kid Rules the World. Buy it. (it is still in print, if you’d like a new copy) Let’s turn the negative publicity into huge sales.

I just might have to help author KL Going take on the idiot wanna-be book banners… That’s really got my dander up.

Now, back to the Meme. Really, it’s more fun to talk about Fat Kid. Helloooo? I’m boring, remember?

Link 5 can be anything you choose: Oh, really. Just go play in the archives. But here’s one I particularly like. Then again, I particularly like them all. The ones I don’t like are waiting to be revised into that state of being particularly liked.

Go find some you like. Report back to me; it’ll help me know what to feed you guys next.

Oh, and rather than pass this one, really. Just go buy Fat Kid. It’s about book banning, people. I mean, other than the sales the publicity will generate, do you want your book to be banned? And if it is, who’ll fight for it — and you???

Well, other than me. *wink*

I’ve got all the prizes for the Summer’s Hidden Treasures contest sorted out now, thanks to my Opening Act. If you entered the contest, look for a message from me starting tonight!

*sigh*

This is the sign of burnout. Right here, folks.

I owe two more Blogging Tips Memes, but to be honest with you, I lost heart. I had the drafts saved; all I needed to do was post them.

But then I was blog surfing and came onto some strangers’ blogs and what did I see? Memes. And not the fun kind, like the Schmoozing award (we’ll get to that one in a second). The kind that didn’t give me ANY inkling into what the blog was about. And I thought, I don’t want this to be what people see when they visit me.

Thus, I nuked the drafts of Blogging Tips #3 and 4. Really, I have no words of wisdom other than to say have fun with what you do. And if you can’t glean that from my posts or from the fun comment trails, nothing I can spell out will help.

Thus, on to the FUN.

Both PJ at the Urban Recluse and Thomma Lyn have graced me with The Power of Schmooze Award.

This one means as much as the Rockin’ Wench Awards you guys handed me. I’m gonna get all sappy here and make poor Trevor throw up in his motorcycle boots, but so be it. I’m pleased you guys have let me be part of your lives, and I’m even more pleased when you demand I step in front of my fictional characters and speak to you as myself. Most of all, it gives me hope that when Trevor’s Song finally hits the shelves, you’ll all buy multiple copies. Yes, I promise now to make it VERY easy for you to get autographed copies, all the while helping out some local-to-me independent bookstores.

…and in the week since I wrote this post, more awards have come my way. I’ll get to those later in the week or next week. Stay tuned. By all means, keep the honors coming! It’s not just good for my ego in the face of rejection letters for a hard-to-place debut novel. It makes Trevor and the rest of the band happy.

Now, onward. There’s more fictional fun ahead for you; my blog queue is stuffed to overflowing. There are more changes afoot… keep your eyeballs peeled.

And in the meantime, my friends, rock on.

Ya know, I keep track of my awards here at home. I’ve got a small part of my website devoted to them, but that’s still a work-in-progress. Who has time to prettify that page when you guys keep handing them out to me?

ShapeShifter wins awards, too, you know. Mitchell and Eric often duke it out for best guitarist, and Daniel gets noticed for his drumming. There’s been great songwriting, fan selections, and even a vocalist award or two for the frontman himself, The Great Mitchell Voss. Or so Trevor likes to call him.

Thus, for this week’s Thursday Thirteen, I bring you my latest award: PJ at The Urban Recluse was kind enough to award me the Creative Blogger Award.

Thirteen . . ., well, just read on. 1. Trevor: You know, more and more people are getting this place of ours. I like it. Mitchell: It’s like a band. You start small and get a few fanatics who’ll be with you through pretty much anything. They help you get the word out and before you know it, the ink’s drying on the deal. 2. Trevor: Except there is no deal for Susan. Eric: It’s a matter of time. Mitchell: Yeah. People can only ignore things for so long, and then they wake up one morning and decide that no matter much it doesn’t fit into their neat little world, they can’t ignore it. Power of the people and all that. Daniel: I wish there was something more we could do to help out. I mean, this isn’t just about Susan. It’s about us, too. 3. Trevor: It’s about me, you mean. Daniel: No, it’s about all of us. Trevor: The book’s called Trevor’s Song. TREVOR. That’s me. 4. Mitchell: But the blog’s about all four of us. Eric: And some bonus friends. Trevor: Bonus friends? Eric: I wouldn’t say it like that around Mitchell. One of them’s Kerri. Trevor: Like I’d touch that woman if you paid me to. 5. Daniel: The book may be about you. Mostly. But the blog’s about all of us. Mitchell: And the award was for the blog, not the book. See the difference? 6. Trevor: Like I know? I’m a bass player, for fuck’s sake, not a writer. Mitchell: Figures. Can’t put up when we need you to. Trevor opens his mouth to answer, but Mitchell interrupts. 7. Mitchell: The book’s done. The blog’s got some fans. Why aren’t there more? Eric: Exactly! Look at the gold mine here that no one’s tapping. Trevor: Mines cave in. Checked the news lately, Drummer boy? Does the state of Utah ring any bells? Eric: Those poor people. Their poor families. Trevor: You gonna pray for them? Eric: I know you’ll never admit it, but you are. Trevor rolls his eyes but doesn’t answer. 8. Mitchell: So far, Susan’s been given three Thinking Blogger Awards, Three Rockin’ Chick/Wench blogger awards, a Schmoozing Blogger award — Trevor: Think Susan’ll ever publish that post she wrote about it? Eric: In time, Trevor. Everything comes in time. 9. Daniel: Including a book deal for Susan? Eric: We can hope. 10. Mitchell: I just don’t get it. Daniel: Get what? Mitchell: Why more people aren’t jumping on this train. Trevor: Trains wreck. 11. Daniel: Books aren’t like demo tapes, that you can put out and circulate around and watch your popularity grow. Trevor: Why not? Eric: Books cost more to print. And we have this blog. Maybe we should be pushing it and let the book follow. Trevor: The book has to follow. The blog’s already here. Eric: So we need to build the buzz higher and louder. Daniel: How? 12. Trevor: More of me, of course. Daniel: Less is more. Trevor: Not when we’re talking about Trevor Fucking Wolff, it’s not. Mitchell: We’re supposed to be talking about Susan’s awards. 13. Trevor: Why? I’m way more fun to talk about. That’s why the focus of Susan’s blog isn’t Susan. It’s me. Daniel: It’s all of us. Trevor: You know, you sound like a broken record. Eric: There’s a lot to be learned from broken records, Trev.

Thanks again to PJ for the much-appreciated recognition!

And now, in keeping with meme rules, I’d like to pass it on to these people:
Rhian, whose creativity knows no bounds
Robin, who earned it this week.
and L^2, whose creative skill with a camera is mind-blowing.

Check this out to learn a bit more about me.

Also, the Tour Manager and I are off to a 22-mile (round trip) bike ride today. Uphill both ways, from the sound of it. We’ll be riding from Ohiopyle to Confluence, PA. So if I’m not around, you know why.

And speaking of that part of the state, it’s not far from where I took #1 to Cub Scout Camp. Last week, a Boy Scout camping in a different location on the same camp burned himself badly — over 50% of his body suffered second and third degree burns. We don’t know much else, but from all of us here, we wish him speedy healing and limited pain.

Talk to you guys later.

Last week, I listed stereotypes of ShapeShifter fans. Many of you identified in one way or another with the list; it’s pretty universal.

This week, it gets more challenging. Are you a true fan if you don’t fit any of these thirteen things? Absolutely.

Thirteen truths about ShapeShifter fans 1. They are surprisingly different — from the stereotypes and from each other. 2. A number of them are intelligent and/or highly successful in careers you might not expect right off the bat. 3. Many of them listen to a large variety of music — not only hard rock, metal, or whatever you’d like to call it this week. 4. The die-hards are as devoted to ShapeShifter as a pit bull is to its master. 5. Many of them feel that they don’t fit in anywhere but here. 6. Many of them come from abusive or otherwise hurt backgrounds. 7. Not all the girls come around because the ShapeShifter guys are cute. Some of them are into the music, plain and simple. 8. They’re not defined by their physical appearance (refer to last week’s list to see what I mean). 9. Many of them draw their inner strength from the music. The tales of how and when they did this make for frequent backstage appearance stories. 10. Many of them feel that Mitchell‘s lyrics were written just for them. They wonder how he got it so right. 11. Many will go into debt and/or bankrupt themselves in order to see ShapeShifter perform all over the world. What an excuse to travel! 12. Many of them feel instant affinities toward each other, as though they are fellow members of an otherwise secret club. Relationships are forged, weddings are celebrated all because of ShapeShifter. 13. Mitchell, Daniel, Trevor, and Eric are popular names for the children of ShapeShifter fans. Go figure.

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

This time, it’s OpenChannel at The Accidental Novelist who’s tagged me.

Before I get to the meme, though, have you noticed how many cool bands are out there with women singers right now? Flyleaf and Evanescence are two of my favorites, of course. But there’s also Coheed and Cambria and now I’m investigating Epica. Don’t forget In This Moment, too. (they need to expand their site beyond Myspace!!) And yes, I know there’s that whole recent tour with the women. How can I not have been following it???

My question for you radio people (Uhh, that’d be you who program my XM radio!): where’s the airplay for these women?

Man, these girls make me proud to be a woman.

Now, on to the meme.

Instructions: When this meme is passed on to you, copy the whole thing, skim the list and put a * star beside the tips you especially like.

Add the next number (1. 2. 3. 4. 5., etc.) and write your own blogging tip for other bloggers. Try to make your tip general.

After that, tag some other people. It was originally 10 others but I don’t know 10 people who would do this. So make it 5-10. I’m changing the rules. Haha.

1. Look, read, and learn. ****-https://www.neonscent.com/

2. Be EXCELLENT to each other. ***-https://www.bushmackel.com/

3. Don’t let money change ya! *-https://www.therandomforest.info/

4. Always reply to your comments. ******-https://chattiekat.com/

5. Link liberally — it keeps you and your friends afloat in the Sea of Technorati. *****-https://chipsquips.com/

6. Don’t give up – persistence is fertile. **-https://www.velcro-city.co.uk/

7. Give link credit where credit is due. ******-https://www.sfsignal.com/

8. Pictures say a thousand words and can usually add to any post.***-https://scifichick.com/

9. Visit all the bloggers that leave comments for you – it’s nice to know who is reading! *****-https://stephaniesbooks.blogspot.com/

10. When commenting on others’ blogs, a few kind words go a long way. – ** https://shelflifeblog.blogspot.com/

11. When you’re starting out, comment on all the blogs you like to read; that way the bloggers will know that you exist! **;) https://astripedarmchair.blogspot.com

12. Make sure you check your links! * https://superfastreader.com By way of explanation–when you cut & paste the text of a meme, you don’t get the underlying links. If you just see text, you need to turn the text into links manually. If you see hyperlinks, you can cut & paste from the Page Source to get the HTML code and preserve the links. In Firefox, you can use Command/Apple-U to see this. The whole point of a meme is to spread link love, but you need more than just the text to do that.

13. Give your blog a theme/focus; make a niche for yourself. * https://www.theaccidentalnovelist.blogspot.com/

14. Don’t judge your blog’s success by hits or the length of your comment trail. What matters is what you put into it. westofmars.blogspot.com

Now, for some tags…

Sparky Duck
Sophisticated Writer